HOGZILLA

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Haley the Hogzilla



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A dynamic figure, often seen running miles and extreme lifting of steel. I have been known to have interior decorated a train station on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention with window treatments. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban, Spainard, and Japanese refugees. I write award-winning operas with only a hummmm, I manage time efficiently at 3:00 am. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row and then swim the channel for time. I woo men with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I really know how to tell more than the truth!

I am an expert in ceramic, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Seguin. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Sand hills from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello and washboard. I was scouted by the UT olympics. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard made of twigs and clay. I enjoy urban hang gliding when it is night. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge Ovens are higher ampiage so there is a .50 fee. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie with fantasy football.
Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail from all local vendors. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured Austin with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I yoga for 60 minutes.
My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy and winning the match at the same time. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening for guest's. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations with the CIA.
I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Oregon, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid some on time. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down.
I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prize winning clams. I have won bullfights in Marion, cliff-diving competitions in Medina Lake, and spelling bees at the San Antonio. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.
But I have not yet graduated with a PHD in college. Haley Hogzilla


Member Since: 6/20/2006

Fitness Minutes: 0

My Goals:
My Goals for Hogzilla is to eat healthy and loose poundage! Control the appetite and learn Meditation for self control.


My Program:
My program consist of One Day at A Time... get through it.



Personal Information:
haleyhuffaker@yahoo.com, I live in Texas~HOT!


Other Information:
A public figure, often seen running miles and extreme lifting of steel. I have been known to have interior decorated a train station on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention with window treatments. I translate ethnic slurs~ for Cuban, Spainard, and Japanese refugees. I write award-winning operas with only a hummmm, I manage time efficiently at 3:00 am. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row and then swim the channel for time. I woo men with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I really know how to tell more than the truth!

I am an expert in ceramic, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Seguin. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Sand hills from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello and washboard. I was scouted by the UT olympics. I




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