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Introduction Text I think I am finally ready to tell my story.....My name is Lori. I am a 47 year old widow. I am an only child whose family is all deceased. I was born a month early with cerebral palsy affecting my entire right side. I was only 5lb 10oz at birth. My father used to hold me in his palm. I had numerous leg lengthening surgeries as a child and wore braces on my right leg for years. At 5 years old I had my 1st grand mal epileptic seizure (one of many). At 9 I had a seizure so bad that a piece of brain broke away & the seizure caused my body to go into shutdown mode. My organs all shut down and my parents were told to prepare for the worst. I did recover after 90 days of a coma. At age 17 I developed blood clots in my legs & lungs and almost died again. That was the 1st of 3 battles with the clots. In 1995 the drs finally just put me on coumadin (blood thinner) for the rest of my life. As I've gotten older the diseases have gotten worse. Morbid obesity, fibromyalgia, COPD, asthma, oxygen use, herniated disk in my neck, lymphademia, cellulitis, depression, arthritis, and neuropathy are just a few of my illnesses. Starting at age 14 my uncle by marriage decided to introduce me to sex and proceeded to sexually abuse me until age 18. During this time I was already morbidly obese, had no dates or boyfriends and my parents got divorced. When I did start dating it was losers (alcoholics, drug addicts, emotional abusers). When I met my husband at age 23 & married at age 24 I thought I had found the man of my dreams. That lasted for about 12 years. We were married for 17 years total & I should have left him at about year 12. He was an emotional abuser that left me with absolutely no self esteem. He told me since I was disabled I could handle life by myself. He had me convinced of that! I got fed up with his alcohol and vicodin abuse & his threatening me with a knife. When we were getting evicted for the 3rd time I finally told him I needed to feel safe & I couldn't feel safe with him. I told him I needed to live alone and then reconcile with him after he got his life & addictions clean. On May 17th 2008 he tried to overdose for the 4th time in his life. His boss and girlfriend took him to the hospital and he was admitted to a "clean up" facility. After 6 days the drs there told me he wasn't depressed or a danger to anyone including himself. I told them about the 3 times he had threatened me with our guns and they basically said all of his problems were my fault. They released him from the hospital on Sat May 24th. We were in the process of moving, I had rented a storage facility since not having anywhere to go. On May 25th, my husband of 17 years shot himself in the heart & made me watch while he did it. I watched frozen as the blood drained out of his chest and he looked at me. I truly believe that if my friend Patti had not been there he would have shot and killed me too. Needless to say, I still have nightmares. I was moved out of my apartment by friends. Somehow they kept me out of the bathroom (where the suicide took place), & wouldn't let me look at anything. I moved into a motel room with my cockatiel Smokey until I was able to find an apartment. During my entire adult life I kept a full time accounting job. On Aug 8th 2008 I was fired from the job I adored for bogus reasons after a fall and was immediately given disability on my first try. My body let me know that I would have never been able to keep working...it was just too hard to move anymore. I found Herbalife during this time & started losing weight, (as long as I followed the program). Now I live with my dog Peppy in an apartment. I have aids come in to assist me and we are making tweaks to my lifestyle. I no longer drink regular sodas or add sugar to my coffee for starters. As time goes on, I will be changing more things and becoming healthier everyday. I am hoping to make a go at a new life. I want to finally lose this weight, find the man of my dreams and feel better.

I am looking to finally be healthy & be able to do things that "skinnier" people can do! I want to be able to walk & go places without being a burden to others!







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