Happy Friday! Love is in the air! They say "love is a many splendored thing", and so I thought it might be a-propose for some Valentine giggles about marriage to get ourselves in the right frame of mind for the weekend ahead. Believe me, this was no half-hearted project for me; I put my whole heart into it! I know you're getting excited, and can heartly wait, so let's get pumpin' . . .
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, 'You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, 'Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't even notice.”
A man inserted an ad in the classifieds: It read: “Wife wanted”. The next day he received hundreds of letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.”
If a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
"I married Miss Right. I just didn't realize her first name was Always."
A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law better than I like mine."
A woman turns to her husband on their silver wedding anniversary and says, Honey, will you still love me when my hair turns grey?" Her husband replies, "Why not? I stuck with you through the other six shades."
After finishing our Chinese food, my husband and I cracked open our fortune cookies. "You go first", he said. Mine read, “Be quiet for a little while.” "Now it's your turn", I said. His read, “Talk while you have a chance.”
My wife just nudged me and said, "You weren't even listening, were you?". I thought, That's a strange way to start a conversation. . .
An interviewer asked a married couple what their secret was to their long and happy marriage. The husband chimed in, "My wife and I always compromise." "I admit I'm wrong, and she agrees with me."
Shortly before our 25th wedding anniversary, my husband sent 25 long-stemmed yellow roses to me at my office. A few days later, I plucked all the petals and dried them. On the night of our anniversary, I spread the petals over the bed and lay on top of them, wearing only a negligee. As I’d hoped, I got a reaction from my husband. When he saw me, he shouted, “Are those potato chips?”
I hope some of these made you laugh wholeheartedly!
I heartily wish each of you a very Happy Valentine's Day! Enjoy your weekend! 57 days ago
It's Friday, and with much of the country having snow this week, I thought you might appreciate some winter jokes. For those of you who live in the Northern states, I know that winter is snow problem for you. By now, all of you snow how this works - You read . . . you laugh. However, if you don't like them, please don't give me the cold shoulder.
Why do bees stay in their hives during the winter months? 'Swarm
A wife texts her husband at work on a very cold and icy morning. . . "Windows frozen, won't open." Her husband types back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it." Wife texts back five minutes later: "Computer is really screwed up now."
What do you call a hacker stuck in his house during a winter blizzard? Edward Snowed-in
Yup, ol' man winter paid us a visit. This morning I had to scrape the ice and snow off my windshield. I used my supermarket's loyalty card. I only got 10% off.
SHARON10002
J U S T F O R G I G G L E S It's Friday, and time for some laughs. Lately, the Friday Just for Giggles have become quite a big dill around here, but I doughnut want to taco 'bout it. However, I yam relishing the positive feedback, and I'd give a penne for your thoughts. . .
I hope you find these puns quite a-peeling because they are all "injest".
I've started investing in stocks: beef, chicken, and vegetable. One day I hope to become a bouillonaire.
I'd love to be shipwrecked on a dessert island.
Heinz recently improved the taste of its tomato sauce. The rest of the food manufacturers were left to ketchup.
I knock on the door of the refrigerator before I open it; just in case the salad's dressing.
I was going to share another vegetable pun, but it was too corny.
And last, but not yeast . . .
Green vegetables give me gas. We're talkin' kale force winds.
I hope you have a wonderful weekend! Thanks for dropping by my page to say Hi with your notes and goodies. They always add a smile to my day. 78 days ago