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Monday, July 24, 2006

Sometimes I find it REALLY difficult to stay patient and right now, I can't help but wonder if I'm doing something wrong.

I've been tracking calories and working out hard for quite awhile now, lost some initial weight (which I'm proud of!), but now I'm noticing the scale weighing in on the high side of what I'm comfortable with...not much, just a few pounds. I just have this HUGE fear of tipping over *a certain number of lbs.* again. I was so depressed this winter when I was overweight...it is just not fun. So when the scale starts to lean upwards and not downwards over a considerable time period (about a month) and have to re-evaluate what I'm doing.

And so, I re-evaluate. What am I doing to make weight loss difficult? I exercise and run, I eat very healthy, and I track everything - well almost everything - I eat.

I took some measurments this morning and compared them to that of Decembers. Almost all have gone down except - except my waist line :( I can't help but be discouraged. It is the last thing to go...but it is SO hard to lose and I just don't know what it will take. Honestly, it is a huge frustration. I know it is bad to focus on just one thing...that I do have other assets...I guess my frustration is in question form, "What will it take?!"

Maybe I just need to stop being so paranoid about gaining a few pounds and losing weight. Being a very analytical person, it is so difficult. In my mind, I'm always searching for anwers and reasons WHY things happen, why people act the way they do, why, why, and why. Privately, I can be a little neurotic. But hey, I have an excuse. I'm a psych major aren't I??

Anyway, I think I might try and bring myself up with some good ol' reading and dreaming of new clothes. Haha.
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