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my little dream

Monday, January 11, 2010

I was adopted...at 1 mth. And if your adopted you will understand what I am about to say. Now keep in mind that I didn't KNOW ANYTHING or meet my birth parents until I was 28.

I knew my birth parents ages..they were 15 and 16. But that was it.

I imagined as a child, a teen, a young adult into woman hood that my birth mom was beautiful (physically), I imagined her very skinny with long blond hair. That was certainly the way she was.

At 28 I located my birth family (for medical information, if any and ended up meeting them instead) she sent a picture from when she "just" got pregnant with me, she was an absolute TOOTHPICK. This even hightened what I had already imagine. THIN & BEAUTIFUL....When I finally got a updated REAL picture..I was shocked. She was not thin at all. She was not what I had imagined. I won't lie...at first the skinny picture made me depressed...I obviously did not get those genes. And then when I got a updated picture I was bummed because obviously I DID get her genes. I felt doomed..

You ever get that feeling you "NON ADOPTEES"...do you feel out of place from your mom or feel cheated you did or didn't get those genes? Do you think it impacts your thinking?

I should feel impacted. My mother puts my round bootie to shame and I hate mine already.

Speaking of which, do you see the add for OLD NAVY GOGO pants that give you a but? Amazing what people will do to get a round butt and I just want to get rid of mine.

I did take my measurements yesterday...I am not sure how accurate I did, but at least it is something besides the scale.

I am not to fond of scales because I don't find them to be the most accurate source of weight loss when used solo.



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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • PATRICIA1904
    "You ever get that feeling you "NON ADOPTEES"...do you feel out of place from your mom or feel cheated you did or didn't get those genes? Do you think it impacts your thinking?"

    Well, my mother has severe mental disorders (BPD, MDD, GAD...probably more) so sometimes I feel like I have to struggle to make sure I don't fall into those categories and I do blame her for my anger issues because of how she raised me (she was physically abusive). I didn't have a father so I always wondered how much of his genes he gave me and now that I am an adult, my Aunt says that I am much like him. The only bad thing is, his whole family is obese. Huge, infact. so I am always on the look out about my weight. I was fat growing up and after my kids I got even fatter. Now that I am struggling at my youthful age of 25, I have decided that if it's not now, it will be never!!! So yeah, it all impacts my thinking greatly...I just try to be more optimistic about it. That's all.
    4066 days ago
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