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Shhh...it's a secret!!!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

So funny isn't it, how we think that our fat is a big secret? Like if we hide behind big clothes and drink diet soda in public that we are doing a really good job of disguising our weight? Is it just me?

I literally hid behind enormous clothes for years. I would never even think of wearing anything form-fitting or figure-flattering because...God forbid someone might think I'm fat!!! OMG, someone might catch a glimpse of one or more of my 4,000 fat rolls and my secret will be revealed!

Ugh, how ignorant for me to have thought that...at 336 LBS!!!! DUHHHH!!!! But I think we have this "image" of ourselves in our minds of how we think people see us, or how we want people to see us.

I no longer feel that way, thanks to my friend Nikki. She helped me finally admit that I AM fat and that it is NOT a big secret and that the enormous clothing I was wearing was actually making me look rediculously bigger than I really was. Now I do my best to wear figure-flattering clothes. Not clothes to hide behind, but clothes to accentuate the good parts of me and gently conceal the worst parts. And, although I'm still at 282 lbs, I have never been happier or more confident. I owe a lot to Nikki. Until last summer, I hadn't even THOUGHT about putting my body into a swimming suit for 20 years! But last summer I not only put one on, but I rocked it and I had the best summer of my adult life. Now I can't wait to go to the pool this summer and I plan to spend a LOT of time in the sun.

So much of how we feel about ourselves is in our own minds. Crazy, isn't it??
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  • no profile photo HUSBANDANDDAD
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    3999 days ago
    Good for you and your positive attitute!!! It's hard to get past wanting to "hide" the true you. Keep up the good work and enjoy the pool!! emoticon
    4000 days ago
    Great attitude! I had a hard time wearing form fitting clothes even after I lost weight. I was so afraid I would have a roll somewhere!
    4000 days ago
    Congratulations on the changes and realizations you're reaching! Yes, it's something, how many negative beliefs we all carry about ourselves that simply have no basis. Keep up writing a new script! Have a great summer!


    4000 days ago
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