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Day 46: Just Another Day

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

In Thornton Wilder's 'Our Town' the character of Emily asks the Stage Manager (narrator) "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it - every, every minute?" To which he replies, ""No. Saints and poets maybe... they do, some."

Today was an ordinary day, neither good nor bad, with nothing unusual or eventful. Hence the title of this blog. It's been just another day - but that's not a bad thing. Thinks me.

* * *

I was reading through some Spark blogs earlier, and came across this one from Aspenhugger:


She posted a link to a short video clip, and it's well worth watching.

I don't generally recommend YouTube videos and I don't often forward things that go around the 'net, but this one really touched me. I have added it to the top of my 'Keep' file of bookmarks. Beautifully done, lovely pictures - somebody creative must've done some real thinking to come up with this, for all its apparent simplicity.

* * *
I'm about one-quarter of the way through the SP 8-Week Diabetes Challenge, in other words, starting Week 3 tomorrow. I like the concept and the format, especially as I needed something to give my motivation a shot in the arm - and it is doing that. What's starting to concern me is my own lack of 'progress.'

I happily (generally) go along doing my bits 'n' pieces of exercise - none of which, in truth, can be called strenuous, but given the (perpetual, seemingly) PF and the knee problem, whatcha gonna do, right? For the time being I'm settling with 'any movement is better than none' - and I nearly always follow my menu plan. It's working in some regards, especially in terms of my blood glucose numbers. I semi-plateau at times. I have lost as little as a half-pound per week, and there have been a few spells where a couple weeks go by with no loss. But I temper that with '--also no gain,' and I've been satisfied.

Now, though, I feel as if I'm not accomplishing enough, whatever 'enough' means. I've been reading what other people (can we call them 'challengees'?) have been posting in some of the discussion forums. Losses of two and three pounds a week are not uncommon; at least one person reported losing five pounds in less than three weeks. I have lost... I had to go calculate it, I have lost about a pound and a quarter in two weeks. This has left me disquieted.

I know, I know, no one can compare themselves to someone else. Situations are different, start weights are different, metabolisms are different, and in the case of diabetics, there's a lot more variables that come into play. But I'm dissatisfied with myself, and I don't like being dissatisfied with myself. My solution? I think I'm gonna try to stop paying attention to what others post in terms of timespan / amount of weight lost, and consider my achievements good enough for me.

Don't get me wrong, I WANT to cheer people on. I don't want to withhold encouragement in some way. Plenty of my teammates and fellow Sparklers have lost more than I have, or lose at a faster rate than I do, and not only does it not bother me, but I find it heartening. I'm not sure why this is bothering me now, with this Challenge. Maybe I'm not working hard enough at it? Maybe it's that I identify more with these participants because I wear the same label they do? Is it because this is the first 'challenge' I've signed up for?

Eh. At any rate, it's nagging at me. Not a lot, but nagging. Usually when something's nagging at me like this, I will come up with a 'meaning.' That is, determine WHY it's nagging at me, then decide if there's something I need to change and if so, what. Hope this turns out to be an oyster with a pearl.

* * *

Himself is finally (finally!) starting to move to put the house on the market. He's setting up appointments with some local real estate offices, planning to get some figures to work with and see how that pans out. And he's considering the possibility of applying for planning approval to have a second residence built on our site - not in terms of US building it (and yes, he raised that possibility, and NO, I don't even want to take that on at this stage of my life) but rather that it will generally increase the value of the property as a whole if the approval is already in place. A few other houses in our neighborhood have done exactly that, gotten planning approval to put two residences on one lot, and so far three different places have sold and been 'mini-developed' to add a second 'home' (though one of them was just extended to accommodate two apartments). I told him it sounds like a plausible way to go - as long as he doesn't think WE should be the builders--! Lord save me.

Anyway, getting a greenlight, I looked around and thought, hmmm, got my work cut out for me. Empty out some closet space... clear out some kitchen cupboards... been meaning to tackle the garage... eGAD, that yard looks atrocious!... papers and boxes and books, o my. I'll be drawing up a new 'To-Do' list with some specifics on it.

So I got right down to business and spent the afternoon looking at the Greek Islands. I know, but - it's not my fault, really. I was cleaning out the emailbox, all unawares, when an advertisement ('spam' is such an ugly word) from 'Smithsonian Journeys' caught my eye. Nothing for it but I had to look, just in case--

There was a cruise for the Mediterranean generic. Eh. A trip for an 'unexplored corner of France' (the Dordogne). Hmm. Cruise for the Baltic Capitals - now THAT's been on my 'someday' list for a while. But the one that suckered me in was the 'Hidden Islands of Greece.'

Technically, that wouldn't include Oia, on Santorini. You don't know Oia? Yah, you do. You might not know the name, but you'll recognize it when you see the pictures:

The bluest of blues... a pristine white... and the phrase 'sun-drenched' was created for Oia. I've never been to Greece - I've never been on the Continent, which is patently absurd on the face of it, being as I'm so close in the as-the-jackdaw-flies sense. But after we drew up a rough outline for selling the house, and after the email ad caught my eye, and after looking at the descriptions, and after I looked up Santorini, and... well. There it was.

You go up the steps to the left of the terrace. And there you find - the gate to my house.

I suppose it wasn't the most productive of afternoons, but that warm sunshine surely made up for this bleak, overcast, cold middle of February.

* * *

You see what I mean about 'Just another day'? But not a bad day. By no means a bad day.

So it's off for a little Beatleband,* then bedtime. Early start tomorrow: dentist appointment at 8 AM. *sigh* Why so early? 'cause I'm the first patient of the day (dark 'n' dirty job, but SOMEbody has to do it). Actually, I'm scheduled first because he's doing an impression of my teeth (I love that - 'And now, Dr Vic presents his interpretation of - KASEY's TEETH!!!' lol) so it'll be ready to go out with the courier before pickup at 9. Sheesh. Life is too complicated. Okay, maybe some of it is because I don't like having my routine disrupted, and getting up extra early is disruption.


*I've been informed its proper name is 'The Beatles Rockband,' from Nintendo. All I know is, I get a workout, and that's what counts.

* * *

You see what I mean about 'Just another day'? But not a bad day. By no means a bad day.

Goodnight, Sparklers, wherever you are!
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  • SROUS1340
    I've been to Santorini, I spent a summer in Greee 25 years ago. It is the bluest of blues, the whitest of whites, and the incredible Agean Ocean. And then there is Delphi-I swear I could hear the Oracle there. I hope you and himself get to do some trampping about when your house sells. You're a turtle, you can take home with you wherever you go!

    BTW down is down as far as the scale goes. You have lost a lot of weight very steadily. I think sometimes our bodies need a little time to adjust to their new size!
    3671 days ago
    I think you made a very blah day sound quite interesting! I enjoyed your side trip to the Greek isles. Definitely on my list of places to visit.

    As for that nagging feeling you have that you aren't making adequate progress, you really have. On a day in, day out basis, I am not satisfied with my progress either. I want those 3, 4, and5 pound losses every week! Who wouldn't! What I have to keep telling myself is that it is not just all about the scale and how much or how fast you have lost. I think there is something to be said for losing it slowly and sensibly so that you can build a healthy lifestyle you can live with and so the weight can stay lost. God grant us all patience for this journey!

    Continue to enjoy The Beatles Rockband! Sounds like tons of fun!
    3671 days ago
    Thanks for sharing your day and your little escape to Greece with us...the photos were absolutely lovely. Every now and again, we need a little mental vacation.

    Good job recognizing that you are not in competition with anyone, but yourself. It is hard not to compare our progress with others...but, when doing so, we set ourselves up for lots of negative feelings that undermine our efforts. You're doing great and progressing at your own speed....keep pluggin' along, Kiddo!
    3671 days ago
    Even the most blah day is better when we are making healthy choices and doing things that bring color and contentment to our little corner of the world.

    Wishing you contentment, today and tomorrow!
    3671 days ago
    I too struggle to get enough exercise, since I can't do very much with this silly back & cranky knee. I keep doing what I can though, and losing oh! so very slowly. But like you said, losing/not gaining is much to be preferred to gaining! And slowly I am losing. If I could just figure out how to disable my jaws, I'd be in much better shape!

    And I'm with you on the Greek Islands trip! I've never been, but they certainly are on my bucket list!
    3671 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4061285
    I have found that comparing my results to others will only bring me misery. I would like to say that I just don't do it anymore, but that would be a lie. I think we all do it from time to time. I say don't read the other posts if that helps you get past it. No real harm in that. I am pretty sure that you do your fair share of encouraging and motivating others in this community. Good Luck with your challenge. emoticon
    3671 days ago
    I often feel the same way you do about the weight. Everyone else seems to be moving along so much better than me. This was sent to me today by a friend. I thought you might could use it:

    No matter what happens...
    Do not be discouraged,
    But move forward,
    Life can be a constant challenge,
    but it is worthwhile!
    And, never give up on your journey!


    Faith is the ability to believe even though you cannot see.

    Life is a constant challenge and the next time you decide to go to Greece I want to go too! emoticon
    3671 days ago
    Another thought provoking blog for me Kassey...I use to compare my weight loss to others and have always come away so disappointed until I realized tht this is MY journey and no one else's...you certainly have alot on your plate for doing nothin today and that escape to Greece...that is one vacation I'm going to take that is on my Bucket list !
    3671 days ago
    a lot in your blog--a busy life Kasey--- losing weight is hard--not losing when you want to lose is harder ----- The main thing though is that it IS coming off ----and your house ---- and the dentist---And what on earth is Beatleband?------ One day please blog about that--LOL-Lynda- emoticon
    3671 days ago
    Did you see the Trevor McDonald programme a few weeks ago? He went visiting there and it looked wonderful

    BTW,,WHAT is Beatleband that you keep telling us about?LOL
    3672 days ago
    Kasey, I completely get what you mean about comparing weight loss with others. It is completely frustrating. I have quit setting weight loss goals for myself. I set plenty of calorie intake and exercise goals but I don't set goals for the things I have no control over such as the speed of the weight loss. I am pleased with myself if I meet my intake goals despite what the scale says.
    3672 days ago
    It seems as though you got a lot done, including a lovely mental escape to Greece for awhile! Good job!
    3672 days ago
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