Missing my Dad on his birthday
Friday, February 18, 2011
Today would of been my dad's 82 birthday.
No matter how hard I try to concentrate on other things and sparking, my thoughts keep going back to him.
I have a hole in my heart that only my dad can fill. He was my rock and always will be as I listen to my inner voice recalling his strong assurances that I could do anything I put my mind to.
My dad taught me what unconditional love is. He was not the one to come right out and say "I Love You and he was not the lovey dovey huggy kind of guy BUT he was one to always be there to bail me out of whatever situation I managed to get myself into and he NEVER gave up on me. I was never a secure teenager and loved to party in my young adult years, how he put up with me I will never know.
I remember the day I graduated from my Alcohol and Drug counseling Certificate Program. It was my big day yet I went out and bought my Dad the new outfit (dockers, shirt, and even a pair of brand new loafers) as he was one not to spend the money on himself but rather on his home and kids. I saw the glint of pride in his eyes as he met my intructors and they said how smart his daughter was.
Dad taught me the importance of family and sticking by one another no matter what. Enjoy the good times and leave the bad behind. To help ensure his family stayed together every summer we took the annual summer 2 week vacation to Cape Cod and still do. It is ironic he hung on for the last vacation and in fact died the night we got home. I see my dad in every sunrise over the ocean, every sunset over the shoeline with the Sagamore bridge in the backdrop, and every rainbow that appears after the storm.
It was my privelage to take care of you Dad for the last 2 years of your life. I am trying my best to keep my promise to take care of mom and keep her in the house. How I just wish I had learned more from you . The last few months you tried to cram showing me how to mow the lawn, use the weedwacker, edge the walkway, drain the furnace, replace circuit breakers, and on and on. Oh Dad, I just didn't have enough time to take it all in. so if you are listening dad and reading this could you send an extreme home makeover this way.
The hole in my heart remains and I try to keep it plugged with memories of you, carrying on the legacy of family, and taking care of your precious wife.
Happy Birthday Dad
Forever in my heart
Your loving daughter,