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Thursday, February 24, 2011

I'm wondering about doubt. I'm wondering about the ways we sabotage ourselves, psych ourselves up or wear ourselves out. I'm wondering about the ways we doubt ourselves when it comes to diets, relationships, work, life.

I'm wondering about discernment. Do I doubt at all the wrong times? I've made some questionable decisions in the past... flown right past warning signs with clear indications to use caution, yet I'd plow on full steam ahead. I'm wondering if I fail to doubt when doubt is reasonable, throw on my rose colored glasses and roll on. When I find myself in the proverbial deep end, I wonder how and why I willingly sailed off the cliff. That's when I usually doubt... only when I'm flailing in the deep end.

Tonight I'm questioning doubt itself. I was explaining to a super wise, incredibly awesome spark friend (aren't you all?!) that I want some input on this... So, I'm opening it up to you. In going back to work with hospice, my intention has been to find and join the team of professionals who care, Really Care, for their patients/families. I found 'em all right. The local team is just what I'd hoped for, envisioned, thankfully joined. I don't doubt their skill, compassion, empathy, dedication. I suppose I doubt corporate entities. It's hard enough to trust my discernment skills with individuals, let alone corporate structure.

For those of you who routinely balance(d) the demands of what seems like a potentially callous corporate machine with the rewards of some wonderful people/opportunities, how do you do that? How do you suit up in armour to steel yourself from demanding corporate types and keep your heart open to life unfolding?

How do you deal with your doubts?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I see two questions here.
    I don't often doubt things, so will be no help there, but I do often find myself 'towing the company line'. It used to bother me, but it seems not to matter in the big picture. If it appears something is happening for the wrong reason (callous or otherwise), the end result still somehow works out.
    Maybe because there are warm people who care?
    3526 days ago
    My tendency has always been to doubt myself first. That has lessened somewhat as I have gotten older and my values have become more solidified. When making any important decision or dealing with any major conflict, I usually examine my behavior and motivations closely, and try to hold myself to a very high standard that I have done as much as I could to be fair and considerate. I try to see things from the other's viewpoint as much as I can.

    I was fortunate to be able to choose to work as a teacher all of my life. As a group, I have found teachers to be warm, caring, and giving.
    I like that my work was to educate young people. It is something that I value highly and strongly believe in.

    I can only speak about corporations through my husband's experience - and that all depended on the people within that corporation who worked with him. There was good and bad throughout the years.

    Self-doubt can be crippling when it comes to making decisions.
    Self-examination can be a good tool when making those decisions.

    All decisions should be made based on personal values.
    Does this represent my basic beliefs? Is this who I want to be?
    Am I doing everything I can to live what I believe and to follow my values?
    My bottom line is: Is this decision something that I can live with?

    3526 days ago
  • SUNNY332
    My advice is to alway go with your Heart, dear one. All that any of us can do any given day is the best we can do. Balance will come with time.

    Hang in there and quit doubting yourself. Doubt is opposite of certitude
    1. Absolute certainty or conviction that something is the case.
    2. Something that someone firmly believes is true.

    Go with who you believe in and what you believe in - that being yourself and your abilities and all of the doubt will go away.

    Hugs, Sunny

    3526 days ago
  • DAISY443
    Robin, I think that doubt is what keeps us honest and on track. We need that to balance our tendency to rush in where angels fear to tread! Without that doubt we would all make many more "questionable decisions". Hugs!
    3527 days ago
    As far as corporate entities go, I doubt I can be of any help... I opted out. :)

    I avoided heavily administrated programs, government-run agencies, and corporate involvement. I worked for small, non-profit, non-union organizations that put the management, responsibility and initiative directly into the hands of the people who had to do the work. I always loved my job, always felt privileged in my associates and in the clients I served, and I never doubted the value of my work or the means by which it was accomplished... and none of us ever got paid what we were worth, lol.

    I think the people of whom you need to be asking your questions are your new coworkers. Not all corporate entities are to be mistrusted. :) I doubt you'd find these wonderful people there, nor would you find the hospice so life-giving if the corporation weren't, on some level, life-giving as well.

    I also believe that even though an organization may be callous, the people working in it need not be. I think it's fool-hardy to blindly trust in every situation (a certain amount of doubt is healthy). "How do you suit up in armour to steel yourself from demanding corporate types and keep your heart open to life unfolding?" By doing what you feel called to do to the best of your ability, while seeking the answers to the questions inherent in your doubts. You anchor the practical aspects of your job in your intellect... know your own strengths and define clear boundaries... while keeping compassion and intuition at the forefront of all you do... you let who you uniquely are lead how you respond to the challenges inherent in any job.

    As for my doubts in general, I pray while I walk out in the faith that if God brought me to it, God will also bring me through it, not somehow, but triumphantly. I do what I can to leave room for both myself and situations to grow and evolve. I believe the best about things and people, while remembering that nothing and no one are perfect. I do my best to see things in terms of opportunities instead of problems. I focus my energy on the good, and on where I can have an impact, and on what is specifically mine to do, and I leave the rest alone.

    I hope this helps! Doubts and all, I think this place and this work is very blessed to have you!

    {{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}

    3527 days ago
    I don't have to balance any "corporate machines" at the moment as I am a stay-at-home Mom but I do understand your concerns.

    I can only tell you personally how I face doubt and that is to counteract it with faith. It sounds basic and to me it is. That being said...it doesn't mean it always works out the way I envisioned it would but I know ultimately that God is in control and nothing, absolutely nothing can "snatch" me out of his hands. So my trust is in him alone. Demanding corporate types like you describe are no match when you are suited with the armour of God.

    I don't know if I answered your question Robin because I'm not dealing with corporate issues. I hope I have helped in some little way.

    Love You precious friend,

    3527 days ago
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