What "she" looks like...
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
There are all sorts of reasons that I'm trying to lose weight. I'm a mom and I want to be healthier for my child. I want to be healthier for myself. I want to fit into cuter clothes and not be self conscious in a bathing suit. I want to join the roller derby team. The list could go on forever.
However, I'm particularly motivated by one specific concept these days. I've recently moved away from my home state of Florida. I had lived in the same city for 14 years, and I had a large and connected group of friends there. Some of them are my very best friends, so close that they are truly like my family. I miss them, and their company, fiercely. One of the things we used to do together was go to music festivals. I haven't been with them to one in over 3 years. First because I was in nursing school, and after I graduated, I had my son. I miss attending these events SO very much. 4 or 5 days of live music, dancing, camping, and having fun with 20 -30 of my favorite people in a very beautiful setting.
The thing that is motivating me these days is this: I'm going to another festival (my favorite one of the season) in November 2012. I am beyond excited to see my family of friends. I would love to surprise them with my weight loss. Picturing what that moment might be like has been very inspirational to me. When I'm getting worn out on the elliptical, or am being tempted by eating something I shouldn't, I envision seeing them, and them seeing the new me. I know other people can't be my REASON for losing weight, but I think it's ok if they're my motivation and inspiration some of the time.
What really helps me in those moments of weakness or temptation is to try to concentrate on the specifics of how "she" (for some reason I think of that person I'm trying to become as someone else) looks, feels, can accomplish, wear, do etc... I thought it might help me further to put it down here.
"She" has a thinner, happier face..not to mention smaller boobs ; D. She can participate in "silk dress day" with the rest of her girlfriends at said festival. Her friends will be amazed and happy for her, they will congratulate her sincerely, because they are wonderful and want what's best for her. They will be astonished and proud, and ask what she did to lose all this weight. Her friends arms will fit further around her when they hug, and they will exclaim about this fact. She can get out of her tent less awkwardly and get into, and out of, the camping hammocks without worry. She can hoop and dance to endless sets without getting winded, or feeling sore the next day. Her arms don't jiggle so much, her belly doesn't have quite the roll. Her ex-boyfriends will wonder what happened. ; ) When someone tells her she looks sexy and beautiful in the hoop, she will believe it more easily. She will dance more, walk more, go to distant campsites and the river more, without getting tired out. Her feet and legs will hurt less after 4 days of dancing and walking around, because they are more conditioned and carrying much less weight.
I am happy now, but I will be happier once I accomplish this goal. Thin won't make me happier, but accomplishing something I've been trying nearly my entire adult life to accomplish, will.