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New start not so great

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Well I exercised and drank my water yesterday. I had a good breakfast and lunch. I even had a good dinner. I was derailed by chocolate chip cookies. I really need to find the will power to say no to those treats. I need to ask myself deep down do I really want to lose the weight. I do know that I don't want to gain any more weight. If I eat like I want to eat I will continue to gain weight. At my current weight I don't like myself very much but to be honest I didn'tlike myself when I was 124 pounds either. My motivation is lagging and I need to find again. I know that loosing weight will help me to be healthy and that should be a really strong motivator. Unfortunately the pull of the sugary sweets seems to be more powerful than my motivation to lose weight and be healthy. Also reading late and sleeping late seems to have a bigger pull than my motivation to exercise. I have some personality flaws to overcome in order to lose weight. Now to find a way to do it.
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    I was dragging this morning but after my long walk with the dog (she has to walk no matter how I am feeling), I feel great (might have been the cold air woke me up). Maybe when you are feeling like not exercising, you can recall a time it made you feel great and that will help get you up off the couch. Or, just do it for 10 minutes. If you don't have to face a half hour of something, it doesn't seem so onerous.
    I love reading, but now I try to set a time limit, e.g., "I'll read until X and then take the dog out for a walk, or watch the 11 PM news, or ride my exercise bike for 10 minutes." You fill in the blank. After I have done these things, I allow myself to pick back up the book.
    The food is the really hard part. I recently saw something about research showing that habitual dieters' brains actually re-wire so that when exposed to high fat/sugar/salt foods we will compulsively eat more than someone without diet issues. It is not about willpower. Great. My only solution is to not have these foods readily accessible.
    In all of this, I have determined I have to fight this with all the arrows in my quiver. I am still learning, slipping, trying, re-committing, accepting harsh realities (I have to eat less)....
    Good luck on your journey. We CAN do this - it just isn't a smooth path.
    2574 days ago
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