SP Premium


dating and needing to be thin

Sunday, April 21, 2013

I reentered the dating market. I noticed that men clearly don't want a woman that is overweight, obese or has the slightest amount of extra body fat. They want a woman in the lower half of the normal range or even underweight. It's more than fitness. A woman needs certain dimensions to attract a man. It would benefit me to have a smaller waist since I'm apple shaped. I might blame genetics for my large waist/hip ratio since both my parents carry their extra weight in their abdomen. However, it's changing with exercise and diet so it isn't destiny; I can change it with a lot of work.

I also realize that I really just started working out. At the Y, I walked a lot and took easy exercise classes. I didn't know what it meant to get fit. I had a lower expectation of what it meant to be fit. I'm now at a fitness club. There I'm nowhere near being fit. I can do some of the workouts for the whole hour, but not at full intensity. My coordination is awful. I'm know I'll get better and I'm encouraged since I've only been there a little more than two weeks and I see improvement already.

I hardly sweated when I worked out when I joined. Now, I get a good sweat going. I can feel my muscles work. I feel like I'm pushing myself something I rarely felt at the Y. I want to look and feel good for the rest of my life.

I'm going to give myself a non-weight oriented goal. I'll start with staying in my calorie range and getting all my fruits and vegetables. I'll see if that helps me to focus on my health and not the numbers on a scale.

This link shows the importance of staying thin. www.dailymail.co.uk/fema
I know men appreciate a thin figure. Most think fat woman are unattractive. Many I have dated didn't like skinny women, but fuller figures. Still, anything over a size 10 (today's vanity sizes) is too big for the meat market out there.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • FISHER011
    emoticon emoticon I don't know whether to laugh or cry!
    Keep doing what you are doing & getting fitter & healthier for YOU!
    Best wishes!
    2736 days ago
    emoticon emoticon
    2741 days ago
  • no profile photo MBGUYER
    2742 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12459382

    So how and where did you 'notice that men clearly don't want a woman that is overweight etc.'? Who are those men? Would you even LIKE to date them?
    I may be naive but I believe that only unconditional love is worth while. If love depends on having a small waist...? Hmmm.....

    2742 days ago
    Wow, FORGOTTONMEMS sure said it right! Those men (little boys) who want a supermodel for a wife are worthless. Sure, all of us women want to look nice, but the reality is if you have a REAL MAN he understands that life isn't a VOUGE magazine. My (normal weight) husband married me when I was over 200 pounds. He has a woman that loves him dearly, emoticon is a good mother, a great companion, and an EXCELLENT cook. Twelve years and counting...
    2742 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8574152
    Good for you, for putting your focus on the healthy behaviors that'll help you lose weight rather than the scale itself. While I was losing weight, I only weighed in on the first day of the month. I still do the same in maintenance, and it's working... I feel more accountable if I can't "peek" at the scale.
    2742 days ago
    Let's see... when did I meet my boyfriend of 6 years now and going strong... oh yeah... when I was 200 and some pounds. Don't listen to the lies of society... if you look for a guy who wants a skinny woman you are pretty much looking for a liar and a cheater and a person who will divorce you in the first 10 years of marriage because he subconsciously thinks you "let yourself go" and then will blame it on your character later in court because he's too pigheaded to admit he was in it for superficial reasons.
    2742 days ago
    I would not recommend marrying a man who wouldn't date you if you were overweight. Marry a man who can see your good character and love you for it. I did. I weighed 213 lbs when I married my husband(I was an apple too, now I am a golf tee). He married me because I was a caring, loyal person and a good mom. 10 years later, I now weigh 60 lbs less and he still loves me as much.
    2742 days ago
    Congratulations on improving you fitness level. It will come! I have found I care a little less about the number on the scale than I used to. When I started feeling and seeing muscles and when I noticed my endurance improving, that became more important.

    And the men, true they like the smaller women most times but it's more about how you carry yourself, how interesting you are to talk to that keeps them.

    So while you are building a better you, hold your head high, roll those shoulders back and shine!


    2742 days ago
    I can tell you are really taking a straight forward look at weight and fitness. I so admire your tackling a new level of fitness. You will indeed get better and better at those classes!

    2742 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.