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Wednesday, February 26, 2014

I'm a week and a half in to being back on track, not counting the cupcake incident and i have a handful of corn chips with dinner last night. But beyond that, I've stuck to the plan. And I am starting to feel better. Its tough because feeling a little bit better makes me impatient to feel A LOT better and I'm definitely not there.

But I did want to document the improvements I'm experiencing already

- Sleeping better. I still feel a little wired at bedtime. In fact, the last couple nights I've laid in bed thinking I felt *almost* good enough to get up an exercise which is not how I want to feel when its time to go to sleep. But I also don't seem to take quite as long to fall asleep and my sleep is less interrupted. When I get up to pee, I have been able to go right back to sleep.

- I feel somewhat more ready to get up in the morning when my alarm goes off. I hit the snooze once instead of my usual 3 or 4 times and even that, I don't feel is completely necessary. I don't feel like leaping out of bed and running 5 miles but I'm not groggy and on the verge of tears at the thought of dragging myself through the day either.

-i think I've lost a few pounds, at least the bloating has left. I have not weighed myself and i don't think i will for awhile because i know it will make me panic. But my wedding ring is fitting again.

- my mood is better and more stable. I'm still not Suzi Sunshine but I definitely feel more balanced - also I'm past pms so that helps.

- my energy level is more consistent. I still don't really feel like exercising or cleaning the house, but it doesn't feel unfathomable. Last night, we were out with the kids and I was holding hands and skipping with them through the parking lot. And i typically don't have the energy for that. It was sort of a spur of the moment thing if that makes any sense. Like if i would have asked myself, "self, do you feel like skipping right now?" I probably would have replied, "That's a definite no, self". But I didn't ask. I just did it.

I seem to feel best when I'm at work. If I had the chance to do things like housework or work out around like 9 or 10 - I could probably handle it. I'm still having a crash in the afternoons. It might be more psychological though. I feel so overwhelmed with how much work there is to do around the house after a full day or work not even counting the attention I need to give my kids. ...... all that to say - I am seeing an improvement.

- Cravings are better as long as I don't go too long between meals. I still need to work on my meals themselves. The recommendation is have half your plate covered in vegetables but I just can't seem to get there. I'm just not that interested in vegetables. I keep trying to remind myself that I don't have to have everything perfectly dialed this minute, its a process and I've been out of practice. At breakfast, I'm not having any vegetables. I struggle with breakfast big time. I was doing frittatas for awhile but I got really sick of them. I know Paleo people often treat breakfast like another lunch or dinner but that seems overwhelming to me. I'm already mostly having leftovers for lunch. i haven't learned how to make enough leftovers for all that. and right now, I'm really into fried eggs and bacon. I'm sure I'll be sick of that soon enough, but my point is - i need to figure out how to get more vegetables. I've been thinking about incorporating vegetable juice back in but I'm confused about whether that would hamper or help weight loss efforts. There seems to be conflicting information. And also, I just haven't gotten around to it. I think I've been staying fairly low carb, not intentionally. I really need to start tracking. I just forget! and I hate that i either get obsessive with measuring everything and driving myself crazy with not having 100% accuracy or if i just estimate - then i don't have 100% accuracy. tracking always makes me crazy. blerg.

These changes are all positive and encouraging to me and am trying to not run before I walk. I just need to be patient with myself.

on a side note - i spoke to my son's teacher just to get her opinion about the behavior issues we've been having with them and she said that lately she's been getting the feeling that its not that he WON'T control his impulses, but that he CAN'T. And that's pretty much what my husband and I have been thinking and I'm sort of perplexed about how to proceed. I think an elimination diet is probably a good place to start but that seems like a huge undertaking. And I don't see how that would work with his school. It's a montessori school and they don't really let you bring lunch from home. So I'm still contemplating that. I have an appointment with an allergist but I don't really have any great hope in whatever they have to say. His teacher suggested occupational therapy. So I guess we'll explore that. I'm sure there's some kind of counseling or psychology thing we could do but i don't know that we can afford it to be honest and i think it would take some time and effort to find something useful.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • JR0124
    I'm so glad to hear you are doing a better!
    2610 days ago
  • RYDERB
    Reading that you skipped across the parking lot with your kids made me so happy! I'm so glad you're starting to feel better. I know it's taking lots of effort on your part but you're worth it, and I know you'll get there.
    emoticon
    2611 days ago
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