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In shock.....

Thursday, March 13, 2014

This past Thurs, my life changed forever. My wife, partner, lover, best friend Sherry collapsed at home in the bathroom in front of me, and despite my calling 911 and starting CPR, her body just wasn't strong enough. She collapsed in an awkward position in btwn the tub, wall, and toilet. I asked if she could hear me, and she looked at me and said yes. I went to get the phone. As I was on the phone with emergency, I was pulling her out to get her in a position to start CPR. Stuff had already started to come out of her nose and mouth. She was in asystole the whole time. emoticon She was in ICU, on a vent, they had cooled her to 93 degrees to slow down things down, including the swelling in her brain. She was on BP meds to keep it up, and sedated for the cooling/vent. Her liver and kidneys were failing basically right away. They started continuous dialysis b/c she had almost no output in abt 30 hrs, despite all the fluid they were giving her. It was all just basically collecting in her tissues. The dialysis helped with that, but unfortunately not with the brain swelling. Sat night, her temp dropped to 94 on it's own, so they had to rewarm her to do an EEG they had planned for that day. I was HOPING, PRAYING, BEGGING, MAKING DEALS, everything to have good results on this test. emoticon emoticon Only random small seizure spikes. She never had any response to stimuli, no gag reflex, nothing. :( :( :(
So Sunday night, after her family was able to come and see her, I made the horrifying, hardest, gut- wrenching decision of my life. I had to let my wife go....I know she was always with me, always will be. It was just her body.....I don't know what to do without her, we were together for 13 years. I actually just spoke to her mom on the phone and she said I was the best thing that happened to Sherry. Everywhere I look, I see her.... I know I need time...my heart is just aching and empty without her......

Everyone, PLEASE, PLEASE learn CPR. I pray to god that none of you will ever need to use it, but it's better to be as prepared as possible. You CAN save a life. emoticon
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