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SAYING GOODBYE YET AGAIN

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

IT'S BEEN A ROUGH WEEK FOR ME. LAST WEDNESDAY I HAD TO PUT SCRAPPY (MY MAINE COON MIX CAT) TO SLEEP. SHE WAS 13 YRS OLD & I HAD HER SINCE SHE COULD FIT IN THE PALM OF MY HAND. SHE HADN'T BEEN ACTING HERSELF FOR A WHILE & HAD A WEIRD COUGH (NOT THE SAME AS HAIRBALL). SHE WAS ALSO LONG OVER DUE FOR GROOMING, BUT HER SHOTS NEEDED UPDATING. I WAS TOLD THAT SINCE SHE WASN'T FEELING WELL, THAT THEY WEREN'T LIKELY TO GIVE HER SHOTS. SO, I MADE AN APPT 2 MONDAYS AGO. SHE HAD LOST ABOUT 2 POUNDS OVER A FEW MONTHS. THE VET WAS CONCERNED & WANTED TO DO A SERIES OF BLOOD WORK & X-RAYS. I ONLY HAD ENOUGH MONEY TO DO 2 OF THE BLOOD WORK & THE OFFICE VISIT, WHICH ALSO WIPED ME OUT, MONEY WISE, FOR THE REST OF THE MONTH. I WAS TOTALLY UPSET. MY FOLKS CAME OUT TO HELP CALM ME DOWN & HELP FINANCIALLY (OF WHICH MADE ME FEEL WORSE). MADE ANOTHER APPT FOR 2 WEDNESDAY'S AGO TO DROP HER OFF TO FINISH THE BLOOD WORK & GET XRAYS. LATER THAT DAY AS I WAS LEAVING AN APPT OF MY OWN, I CHECKED MY PHONE & SAW THAT THE VETS HAD CALLED & LEFT A MESSAGE. IN THE MESSAGE HE TOLD ME THAT SHE LOST EVEN MORE WEIGHT IN JUST 2 DAYS (I SAW THAT SHE HAD STOPPED EATING), AND THAT ALTHOUGH HER BLOOD WORK FOR THE MOST PART LOOKED GOOD, HER LUNGS WERE FILLED WITH TUMORS. A TYPE THAT WOULD HAVE STARTED FROM SOMEWHERE ELSE. I FINALLY GOT TO MY CAR & ABSOLUTELY LOT IT. WHY DIDN'T I DO SOMETHING SOONER. WHY DIDN'T I TAKE BETTER CARE OF HER. I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN HANDLE THIS. SHE WAS THE ONE WHO WOULD COME RUNNING WHEN I CRIED, KNEW WHEN I WAS UPSET. IF I HADN'T BEEN SO WRAPPED UP IN MYSELF THIS WOULDN'T BE HAPPENING. I CALLED THE VET BACK & TOLD HIM THAT I DIDN'T SEE THE POINT OF PUTTING HER ON SOME MEDICATION TO ENCOURAGE EATING , WHEN IT WAS CLEAR SHE DIDN'T HAVE A GOOD QUALITY OF LIFE. THAT I WOULD BE IN LATER TO BE WITH HER WHEN THEY PUT HER TO SLEEP. THEN PROCEEDED TO CALL MY FOLKS IN HYSTERICS. BEGGING THEM TO COME OUT, THAT I NEED TO DO THIS FOR SCRAPPY & THAT I NEEDED THEIR SUPPORT. I KEPT APOLOGIZING TO SCRAPPY OVER & OVER. I SPENT THE NEXT FEW DAYS WITH MY FOLKS. WHERE THEIR PROPERTY BUTTS UP TO A BEAUTIFUL WOODED AREA. MY DAD & I BURIED SCRAPPY IN THE HOSTA FLOWER BED, SURROUNDED BY BEAUTIFULLY SINGING BIRDS. SHE LOVED TO WATCH BIRDS WITH ME OUT THE WINDOW. NOW IT'S JUST ME & HEMI, TRYING TO MOVE ON.....
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • PCOH051610
    I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I'm a huge animal lover and I have been where you are now. Just remember Scrappy loved you and knew nothing of the turmoil you are putting yourself through.

    I wish I could reach through this computer screen to give you a great big emoticon

    Susan
    2346 days ago
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