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Day 188/Cravings

Tuesday, July 07, 2015

emoticon Can't believe we are about to start school again! Another homeschool year! I finally decided on a curriculum and the girls are so excited that they wanted to start yesterday when I showed them, lol!! We are still going to do Classical Conversations but we are also going to do Easy Peasy. It has great things for all the subjects, I don't have to worry that I'm leaving something out... no I don't think it will be too much, I think it will be just right. We are starting next week, while I'm healing,

emoticon My anxiety is sky high about my gallbladder surgery. I know, it's a surgery the doctor has done "hundreds of times." But that doesn't ease my anxiety one bit. Anxiety doesn't listen to reason. Nor your circumstances. Nor reality. Anxiety only listens to itself. But, thank goodness, they are letting me take my anxiety meds that morning, so I won't completely freak out (I hope).

emoticon I have to go get my nails taken care of today. I'm not allowed to have nail polish on. My fingers are gel, so the salon has to take them off. And my toes? Well, I can't really reach my toes very well so I'm going to have them take the nail polish off of them as well.

emoticon Was reading Made To Crave yesterday and realizing how little I actually pray. I also realized how very often I turn to food instead of God. And how much I let my cravings control me. Here I am on a liquid diet craving a honey bun. Seriously craving a honey bun. So here I go, on the way home and stop at a gas station and got a honey bun. Yes I did. And I ate it in the car before I got home. So when my stomach started feeling achy I suffered through it and didn't tell my husband because I didn't want to admit I ate a honey bun while I'm supposed to be on a liquid diet for my gallbladder. I can't believe I did that. Wait, yes I can. I'm really realizing how much my cravings overcome my common sense and how little self control I practice when it comes to food. I must change this.

emoticon So over the next two weeks, while I'm convalescing, I'm going to work on my food. I'm going to concentrate on what I'm allowed to eat, not what I'm not allowed to eat. I'm going to find foods that I love and food substitutes for foods I normally love. I'm going to buy one of those zoodle makers and give that a try. I know I'm going to have to deal with boredom, that is one reason I bought the crochet projects and some new yarn, so I'll have something to do with my hands. I bought a new waterbottle that keeps water cold (Thermos) so I'll have water to keep me full, and I'm going to have DH cut up a watermelon for me so that all I have to do is pull the bowl of fruit out of the fridge. And I'm going to pray. A lot. I love the examples of prayers that Lysa (the author of Made To Crave) gives in her book. It reminds me that I can be real with God because he already knows what I'm thinking and doing.

I'm probably still going to get on here every day, it's part of my morning routine and I don't want to break that up while I'm still working on it.
I'll post pictures of my project when I'm done with them emoticon
Here is a picture of an older project that I'm super proud of and am going to finally get a chance to use this week. Normally I haul around my "Mom Purse" with all the essentials in it, but this week I don't need it! Yay!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LINDA!
    Very pretty!!
    1694 days ago
    That's really pretty

    I think that is totally normal to feel that way about the surgery - sending good thought :)
    1695 days ago
    cute purse! I understand your anxiety, even when we trust God it can still be there.
    I also read made to crave and I think she has some valid points.

    I go back to work in Aug. (I teach high school), It is hard to believe that school is right around the corner!
    1695 days ago
    Love your project "mom purse"! It is going to be beautiful! I don't have a zoodle maker, but I did make lasagna last week using strips of zucchini instead of lasagna noodles..it was delicious! And, have you tried using spaghetti squash instead of spaghetti noodles? That is super tasty as well! I live in an apartment, so I don't have much room for gadgets...so, anything that I can do and not need gadgets to do it, gets and "A" rating from me!

    Good luck with your surgery! I am so excited for you! You are going to feel so much better once it's all done and over! emoticon
    1695 days ago
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