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Dreams and reality

Friday, December 04, 2015

It was a typical women's banquet. The room was filled with chatting women finding their places at round tables draped with white tablecloths. Red fan pleated linen napkins stood in stemmed glassware, creating an illusion of grandeur.
Friends quickly found their way to our table. An older Katharine Hepburn sat quietly on my left, just one of the girls. We were old enough to choose comfort over the latest fashions but there was plenty of bling.
As the dinner progressed, someone at our table was talking about her recent trip to France. There was an amazing picture of a monument, jewel bright, against a black night sky. Definitely something to see on my next trip to France.

Then the moment was gone. I woke up but the picture remained. What was the name of that monument? Google it. Let's see, image monument in France at night. This could take a long time.

* * * * *
As I've been sick and unable to eat, pictures of food pop up in my dreams. A pair of hands holding out a beautiful pie in my Pyrex fluted pie pan. Flaky crust. Ready to pop in the oven.
As I ponder it later, I wonder why I would dream of mince pie. Does anyone make mince meat pie anymore? I never liked it.

* * * * *
A couple days after Thanksgiving (which I missed because I was sick), I woke up with visions of turkey on wheat. Yep, sounds good...until the nausea overwhelmed me.

As we drove home from the oncologist office this week, I mentioned the food at some of the restaurants we passed. Sis suggested we stop at a Bob Evans, thinking they might have something mild enough for me. A couple miles later she looked at my face and decided I needed to go home. Nausea again.

* * * * *

My oncologist is a highly respected doctor, very good at what he does but a little abrupt. Sister doesn't think much of his bedside manner. She was amazed that he thought that my losing over 40 pounds in a month was a good thing. Everyone knows that can't be healthy.
1. He's a cancer doctor. He's probably seen a lot of rapid weight loss.
2. He pointed out that carrying the extra pounds wasn't healthy anyway. Look at it as an extra boost in my weight loss efforts.
3. I've worked in the health care field all my adult life. I'm used to doctor's bedside manners. I don't read anything personal into it.

He thinks I have gastritis and need to follow up with my primary care physician. I am still so sick. The constant nausea makes me crazy.

My primary care physician has a walk-in clinic. The advantage is that I can see him when I need to see him, not a week after I come down sick. The disadvantage is that there is usually a long wait, depending how many people sign in before me. The office opens at 8 AM. The physician comes in after 10 AM. I've gone to him forever. He knows me. He knows my history.
My sister will take me there tomorrow after she gets home at 2 PM. It's Friday so the wait may be longer than other days of the week.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Constant nausea is horrible. I eat candied ginger slices - they taste good to me and seem to help. My mum always used to tell me it was good to be chubby because if you got sick you could afford to lose a bit of weight. Wise words, perhaps. Feel better.

    Theresa emoticon
    1817 days ago
    Many years ago, I had very bad ulcerative colitis and had to be fed intraveneously for over a month. Food became my obsession during that time. It doesn't surprise me that you are dreaming about food since you have been having problems eating for so long.

    I also lost a lot of weight while I was on chemo (30 pounds). It felt very unhealthy to me at the time, but I've kept it off for over 18 months now and I've been able to regain the muscle mass that I lost while sick and I feel much better for it. Hopefully, with time, things will get better for you.

    Have you thought about seeing a GI doctor? I went to one after I finished chemo and she was a big help to me.

    I hope things turn around for you soon.
    1826 days ago
    I like mince pie. emoticon

    I'm sorry you're feeling so unwell but I do celebrate that weight loss. emoticon You'l get through the nausea and then have the thrill of less joint pain, more energy, and so on.

    Hang in there! emoticon
    1826 days ago
    I so hope you feel better. HUGS
    1826 days ago
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