Day 501/Day 28 of 100
Wednesday, May 25, 2016
I'm having some medical issues. I'm going to talk to my therapist today and then probably get a phone consult with my psychiatrist. My panic attacks are getting worse, and he was certain that they would be getting better. Please say a prayer for me as this is really hard to deal with. I recently discovered the difference between anxiety attacks and panic attacks. I have both, but what I'm dealing with right now is panic attacks. There is a little more to it, but that's all I'm going to share for now. Have you ever been so afraid your whole body tingled as if you were generating electric shocks? It's horrible. I suppose my body was getting into fight or flight mode, and it was definitely on the 'flight' side, but I was unable to move. It was, a singular experience.
I got under two miles done on the treadmill. Panic attack wear me out. It was all I could do to get what I did get on the treadmill. And I forgot to stretch, so I'm all stiff today. Extra miles and extra stretching are in for today, can't let a panic attack steer me from my course!
But I did let it steer me from my nutrition. All I can say is that it won't happen again. When I get overly emotionally wrought like that, I turn to food, usually pastries. I see where I let myself go and I won't do it again. It's not worth it. I can get the same effect of 'comfort' food with a bowl of oatmeal. And that has a whole lot less sugar. Yesterday I was just in an "I don't care" kind of mood.
You see I don't fit into the typical boxes for people with my kind of symptoms. I'm not a drug addict, in fact I'm taking rather good care of my health. I'm not doing alcohol either, I barely ever drink, too many extra calories. But at this point I'm going to tell them I don't care what box you are trying to put me in, I don't care if I don't fit the typical box for people with these symptoms, that doesn't seem to be stopping me from having them, so just treat my symptoms and worry about the boxes later!!! Medical people and their boxes. Harrumph! (lol)