Today.....as I have been for months...I'm at home in my recliner recovering from a major ankle surgery. Where I would LIKE to be is at my church with my faith family worshipping and enjoying the company. And to make matters worse "DH" is less than friendly today (which is a complete understatement.)
I feel like crying. But even tears are out of my reach.
I know this is not a blog about food or weight loss....but I do not have any other place to vent right now. My family reads my public blog and this is not meant for their eyes.
I'm discouraged by the fact that even after weeks and weeks of not putting weight on my foot, it still is hurting. I'm beginning to fear that I will join the numbers of post-surg patients whom I've heard from, telling their horror stories about this particular surgery and the complete failure it has been to them. Where were these people in the weeks before the surgery when I was weighing my options? Why didn't they warn me?
I want my freedom back.
I want out of this house.
I want the pain to go away.
I want to enjoy the autumn since I spent the whole summer in the hospital.
Plus there may be a hurricane coming which could cause us major problems as we do not own a generator and the basement which is mostly finished and full of our stuff, to flood when the sump pump won't work due to power outage. I cannot even get down there to take things out of harm's way.
Well I have prayed about this threat and I have to trust that God will save us from disaster.
I have also asked God to please heal the bones in my ankle.
I just really need to put my faith where my mouth is instead of putting my foot there.
Just now a song came on my phone...Ryan Stevenson, In the Eye of the Storm Here is the link. Please give it a listen. This is how God comforts his children....
I apologize that my positivity has slipped and my sadness is showing. My marriage needs help and other than by Divine Intervention, I am afraid help is impossible. There are a lot of causes of my misery. But there is one God who can deal with them, because I really can't deal with them