Taking back control of my eating!!
Friday, March 10, 2017
Since I got home from the hospital I've let myself go. I stopped the VLCD medically supervised diet, as it was causing me to lose hair and let's face it, I don't have much hair to lose! But I didn't start on my normal way of eating, I let myself eat whatever I wanted. Now some of that was veggies, I'm hooked on roasted Brussel sprouts (who knew those things could actually taste good?!) But I let myself have cake and cookies and fried things and hamburgers... yeah, I really didn't care. I am depressed and when you are depressed you don't care. Comfort food is what you want, and lots of it, so I have been overeating too. That doesn't include in the hospital, when I ate all that bad for you food too. They fed us a lot, and I didn't care then either, I just ate it. Time for that to change.
So what am I going to do? Well, I've already started. I went grocery shopping yesterday and loaded up on veggies. My vegetable bin is full and overflowing (I really need to clean out the fridge!). I am going to insist on going shopping once a week for fresh veggies. I'm actually going to earmark some money strictly for getting my fresh produce. I do want some fruit for when I get a sweet tooth. This time I bought some figs, that should tide me over as long as I don't eat tons of them, I'll have to put a limit on how many I eat!
I'm going to have to really work on not eating too much at a time. It's like my 'full' sensors are broken. I could just eat and eat and eat. We went out to eat for lunch yesterday and I ate so much I surprised myself. But I didn't get that full feeling at all. Weird. So I'm going to have to portion control everything. And drink lots of water to go with it.
I actually had soda yesterday too. I have not had soda in so long it had me buzzing. Then DH brought me a soda too! Yesterday was just a bad food day in general!
But I'm back on track today. I've got a yummy vegan lunch planned. I'm thinking all of my lunches will be vegan unless, the rare occasion where we go out to eat for lunch, then I will just switch and make it a vegan dinner. I'm planning a tomato, cucumber and parsley salad, add a little salt and pepper and yum! Then a coleslaw mix that sounds weird but actually tastes really good. It's cole slaw (just the cabbage mix) with salsa and hummus mixed together instead of mayo. Then you add black olives, or olive of your choice, I put them in whole so I can get it in whatever bite I like, and avocado (I put it in without cutting it up, just halve, peel and toss it in), salt and pepper to taste. It ends up tasting so good, but it sounds like a mess. I keep individual servings of guacamole on hand for in case the avocado is bad. I like adding grape tomatoes too, so yummy.
I'm hoping to take it over to my friends house, if she is feeling better, my way of thanking her for helping me when I was in a low place. Plus a card.. and maybe flowers.
I want to start working out again too. I'm still recovering from this head cold, so not today, but maybe tomorrow I will feel up to it. I want to get back to where I'm working out an hour at a time, if not more. I want to get to where I'm waking up at 0500 again. But I need to take it easy on myself and do it slowly. I don't want to overdo it or push myself too hard. I tend to do that. At the same time I need balance, I don't want to not do enough.
I want to find a simple yoga stretching video to do every day and I want to find some pilates core work to do once or twice a week. I should be able to find that here on SP. I found an arm and a leg workout videos before I went in the hospital that I can do once a week. I just need to get the living room cleaned out and put back together so I will have a place to do them!!
Right now I'm still depressed as can be, and getting anything done when you are depressed is a feat. It's hard when all you want to do is curl up in a ball and make the world go away. But I'm trying. I'm going to go take a shower and get dressed to makeup. I've already texted my friend to see if she wants to get together for lunch. I've made my shopping list so I can go get the things I forgot to get yesterday. I'm working on it. I'm going to try my best when all I want to do is go curl up with a blanket on my bean bag. But I'm going to pick myself up, dust myself off, and keep marching forward. I can do this.