7 Things I've Accomplished in the Last 11 Years
Thursday, June 01, 2017
So today is a very auspicious day for me.
It was 11 years ago today that I started on Sparkpeople, weighing in at my all time high weight of 283 pounds.
In that 11 years, I have lost 90 pounds twice, and gained it back, twice. I have gotten divorced, remarried and had a baby.
I'm could sit here, and think about all the things that I COULD have accomplished in that time frame and didn't. I could beat myself up over the fact that I could have reached my goal weight years ago. But I refuse to do that.
Instead, I am going to celebrate the amazing things that I have accomplished in those years:
1. I found the courage and strength of character to leave a spiritually abusive environment.
2. After 10 years, I was able to leave a marriage that I had been told was a sin to leave.
3. After 2 years on my own, I found the strength to make myself once again vulnerable to and have faith in, the ideas of trust and love, with a man who is not perfect, but is the best partner I could have ever imagined for myself.
4. After more than a decade of barrenness, I got the surprise of my life in the form of the most awesome baby girl in the world. She will be 6 in a few weeks, and I truly can't imagine what my life would be like with out her.
5. Though my weight has had many ups and downs, 11 years and one baby later, I am 38 pounds less than my Highest Weight.
6. I have learned so very very much about my body. What foods/activities help me lose weight. What foods tend to encourage gain. I might not always do or eat the right things, but I I certainly make better choices than 11 years ago.
7. I learned that this is never going to be easy for me, and that's OK. I know myself, and my personality, I like to go all in. And during those times: I do great, and the weight just drops off. But eventually life gets in the way. A major health problem takes away your ability to exercise, a financial crisis means doing the best you can with Ramen noodles, or an emotional loss leaves you weak to the lure of comfort food. Sometimes all you can do when the Tsunami of life sweeps you off the journey is hold on until the water recedes, and then pick yourself up, dry yourself off, and keep going (no matter how far back you've traveled.)
If you had asked me, back on June 1st, 2006, if it would be worth all the hard work in effort for 11 years to lose 38 pounds; I would have said no. And I would have been wrong. It's not the destination; it's the journey. And if you never give up...no matter how often you fail, then that is success.