I Am Not a Lab Rat
Wednesday, December 06, 2017
I hate how doctors always make me feel like they are experimenting on me. In my experience, they love to act superior with patients (especially male doctors) bragging about how much education they have like that means they know everything. I especially hate how they act like you couldn't possibly know your own body. And yet, most of the time they act like they have no idea what they are doing.
I regularly have doctors say things like:
Well, we will try this and see what happens.
I have no idea why that would be like that.
I don't know what the side effects are.
It could help... but I don't know.
Hmm... that's weird.
You can see why this doesn't make me feel confident in my medical care. Most of the time it seems like they are just guessing. I don't expect doctors to know all the answers but it shouldn't seem like they are just experimenting on me or on my kids.
It wouldn't bother me as much if they didn't dismiss what their patients are saying because we are not doctors so therefore our opinions don't matter. I have had numerous doctors say to me, "Are you a doctor?" I find this very disrespectful and insulting. I might not be a doctor but I am an intelligent person and this is my body and I am quite familiar with it.
Recently one of my doctors upped the strength on 3 different medicines at the same time. Plus, she added a new one. I made a comment about how that didn't seem like a good idea since if there were any side effects how would I pinpoint the cause. She agreed with me but then said she wanted to do it anyway. Umm.. ok then. Let us throw caution to the wind when it comes to my health. That sounds like a great plan.
I have been having a bad flare up of symptoms recently so I also have to deal with another round of steroids. Which for me means instant stay puff marshmallow man syndrome. One of my doctors argued with me saying that it was impossible for a person to gain 10 lbs or more within a few days. I made him eat crow when I recently disproved his theory. Friday at the doctor I weighed in at 122 lb. Tuesday at the doctor my weight jumped to 143. I gained over 20 lb in just a few days.
I am sort of glad I had the two doctor visits that recorded my weight so that I could prove to Dr. Jerk that it is in fact possible to gain a large amount of weight in a short amount of time. Though I'm sure he thinks it's because I mainlined doughnuts over the weekend of something. When in fact, I didn't even go close to going over my calories. I found it annoying that not a single doctor ever commented on my 90 lb weight gain but as soon as I gain 20 lbs they felt the need to bring that up.
I know that part of that weight gain is joint inflammation/swelling (I can easily gain 10 lbs overnight from this.), part is TOM, most of it is probably from the steroids, but some might be caused by the medication changes. Now I get to go back and do what should of been done in the first place and adjust each medication one at a time just to make sure that I'm not back on another weight gaining drug.
It is hard at times to stay positive and not give up when every time you are a few pounds away from your goal life gives you another 20 lbs to lose. I didn't even get the joy of eating any weight gaining junk food. It's a good thing I have Sparkpeople to help me keep losing even if it is the same 20 lbs the last few months. I think the Biggest Loser challenge and the 5% challenge really help me the most because I don't want to effect the rest of the team by not doing my best.
Now, I'm going to quit complaining and go do my physical therapy because while venting helps emotionally, it isn't going to burn many calories or keep me physically fit.