Way Off Track
Tuesday, December 12, 2017
I am way off track. I have not been sticking to my food program. My mindset has been, 'well, just one last one...' I can't do that, or I'll have one last of everything! I gained, again. Last month I gained 7 pounds, this month.... I can't remember what I weighed before, only the amount gained, so I'm kinda flying blind here.
So, I got my exercise room cleaned up enough that I can work out. There is a mess where DH is trying to put up the TV for me, but can't find the right cables. I don't mind, I usually listen to music on my phone or kindle. I worked out for 30 minutes last night and stretched, that is a huge accomplishment for me. I've been so dizzy I have not been able to work out. Finally got some meds for the dizziness, and though it makes me drowsy at first, then I'm able to work out.
So what am I doing differently? Well I'm sticking to my food program. No snacking, no seconds, no extra food whatsoever. It's hard. But if I drink a lot of unsweet tea and water, it's not as difficult (gotta quit caffeine soon!). Nighttime is my hardest time. My worst coughing fits from my Vocal Chord Dysfunction (or whatever they decide it is) are at night and I like a hot cup of, well, anything, to soothe my throat. Stew, posole, broth, coffee.... So now I'm drinking hot tea with Splenda. I don't like artificial sweeteners, but it all adds up. So no extra calories from sugar. None. I'm still having my one cup of coffee in the morning, but with splenda instead of sugar. I still plan on quitting coffee as soon as the creamer runs out, so sometime this week. I'll miss it.
I know it is going to be really tough to do, I'm used to eating what I want when I want it. But that has to stop. I meant to do it slowly, over the last two months, but I seem to have this all or nothing mindset. So I'm going all in.
Tomorrow I have two tests. Technically 3. I have to o in for labs and then run to ENT to have a scope done on my throat, then back to where I was to have a CT scan done on my throat. We are going to figure out what is wrong by golly! So it is going to be difficult to juggle my appointments and my food, but no eating out! I'll take my water and some tea and have a shake when I get home. It will be worth it if they can stop these coughing fits!
My dietitian appointment is Monday. I need to lose as much weight as I possibly can between now and then. I can do it. I just need to keep this in mind. If I had a different insurance, they would deny me for the weight I gained. I need to keep in mind that my insurance can still do that if I gain to much weight (though that makes no sense to me, I'm doing this to help me lose weight...
So, it's way beyond time to get back on track. I want a soothing cup of broth for my throat like you would not believe. I cough so much, it gets really raw, but tea with splenda it is. I can do this. I can cut out the extras, I can lose the pounds I need to by Monday, (I hope!). I can stick to this program.
Hope you all get a good night's sleep, it is 0206 here, so I'm back to bed, I think. Hopefully the coughing won't start up again!
Have a Spark*tastic day!