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Neither positive nor negative...

Sunday, December 16, 2018

I can't help but acknowledge that my own worst enemy is not food. It is not the over-abundance of food, the nutritional information of healthy or unhealthy food, the absence of healthier options...no.

My own worst enemy, as many have said before, is me.

I am the person in charge of what I put into my body. I decide what to eat, how much I eat, what I buy so I can eat at all, and every bad decision I make boils down to this one fact: I am at the helm of my own ship, and there is no one forcing me to make the decisions that guide my weight journey, be it a loss, a gain, or maintenance.

My best friend and I decided to forego sweets and fast food for a period of three months. We didn't strictly cut sugar, but we definitely did not eat desserts (except for one night on my birthday and that was IMMEDIATELY regretted) or fast food. I can confidently say that, while a patty melt and vanilla milkshake would be great, the thought of eating it makes me nauseous. I have no desire to buy one, eat it, look at it, sip it, smell it, nothing.

Sweets, on the other hand, are a different beast altogether. Even at the end of the three months without sweets, I still love dessert. I love mug cakes, cupcakes, cheesecake, brownies, chocolate, ice cream, and everything that just sounds delightful. It didn't help that Thanksgiving marked the end of the bargain we struck with each other. Pecan pie is delicious.

Even so, I did not go crazy all at once. I enjoyed one piece of pie, and maybe a Hershey Kiss or Reese's cup once in a week. I am proud to be able to say that I have not gone overboard with sweets.

I have not made many gains, if you will, on my weight loss goal. I had gained a pound from my most recent loss, but I have maintained the one pound. I'd rather see a maintenance weight than another loss.

But then, I'm back to my original point: my own worst enemy is me. I made the choices that helped me maintain the weight, but I didn't decide to do anything else to help lose more than I had, especially after the morning's weigh-in.

I have learned to take the bad with the good, but so help me if I don't start making more good than bad choices!
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