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Fabulous at 40!

Wednesday, February 20, 2019

I turned 40 last June, and it was really difficult. I was looking at my life and my physical state, and thinking that something has got to change. I am not happy, and I REALLY want to be happy.

I am the heaviest I have been in.... well.... EVER, and I've been pregnant 2 times (both times to term). I am embarrassed and ashamed of myself. How did I let it get this bad?

I am struggling with anxiety and depression.

My marriage is a whole other issue, which I am sure is not helping! I have been having an internal struggle about staying in my marriage for the past 7 years. Some unpleasant things happened (not affairs) that sent us together, and me on my own to the therapist. We have seen 5 different therapists together and I have seen three different therapists on my own. Two of the therapists told me that he was the most rigid man they've ever met and that if I want to stay with him, I am going to have to live with him the way he is. Not very positive if you ask me!

Anyway, I am currently all over the place... reading self-help books (more than one at a time, because THAT'S productive), trying to get into doing meditation, looking for answers to just come to me instead of working for them, trying to figure out how to lose weight (even though I know what needs to be done, I'm just too busy looking to actually DO the work), wanting to start a business, wanting to be there for my kids in a productive and meaningful way, but lacking the energy, focus, follow-through, and confidence to do any of it.

So, I am starting back at square one...with my weight!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RHOOK20047
    Welcome to SparkPeople. We are all here for the same reason, no matter what our personal story is. We are here to help each other to get to that healthy point we want to be in our lives. It is not going to be easy, but it is attainable. Make small goals and they will lead to big successes. You have to make you #1 and tell yourself that you are worth it. And remember you didn't gain the weight overnight and you won't lose it overnight. It takes time, determination, motivation and support. You can get it all right here! If you don't take care of yourself you can't take care of anyone else. If I can help in anyway, feel free to reach out to me! My advice is to center your efforts on one thing at a time. When you accomplish that one thing, then move on tot he next. The sense of accomplishment will keep you going in a positive direction. You can do it! We are here to help! Welcome and get active on this site. emoticon
    371 days ago
  • MSROZZIE
    Stay focused on your fitness and weight management goals. One step at a time. Remember, YOU are worth the effort. emoticon emoticon
    371 days ago
  • JOHNMARTINMILES
    40 is the new 19
    371 days ago
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