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Being a parent to someone with BPD

Thursday, May 16, 2019

It's not easy being the parent to someone who displays symptoms of BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder). Now that she's 18 (and we've been dealing with this for the past 6 years) and living on her own - it's not as 'in my face' but she keeps pushing boundaries.

I have to put my phone on silent and while at work ignore her incessant calls and messages so I can try to focus in on work. I am often called away or not mentally present because of these ongoing issues and it's just absolutely draining.

She won't take responsibility and blames everyone else for her issues... yet won't seek help even when guided on steps to help improve things or reach out to professionals.

This week I received this award (a surprise as they normally give it out at our BBQ which I won't attend as I'll be recovering from surgery)... and the moment was dulled by her calls...

This was the Spirit award for my team - for always pushing forward our vision/mission to live a healthy and active lifestyle but health means so much more than the physical part.

As I work to stick to my boundaries and protect myself - I also worry as a parent about my daughter's future and further self-harming behaviors. It's not easy to watch... and all I can control is my own health. So I'm working on continuing that journey here with you and through my own wellness coaching. I'm human - I am not perfect... but as I live and survive each day - I hope that my lessons and sharing will perhaps help someone else.

The power of this community has been one of my greatest sources of strength... We are never alone!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 1CRAZYDOG
    Congratulations on your award. Well done.

    **SIGH** There just is no easy way to deal w/your DD's BPD (I know I'm not telling you something you don't already know.) I AM glad that you'r esetting your boundaries and limits. You definitely need to protect yourself.

    HUGS
    29 days ago
  • MEADSBAY
    Mental illnesses are as hard on the family as on the person.
    You have worked very hard all her life to help her or get her the help she needs.
    It is up to her to accept the help.
    I am in a similar situation, but not nearly as severe.
    Take care of yourself!
    emoticon emoticon
    30 days ago
  • REMBRY
    I truly can't imagine the stress and helplessness you go through on a daily basis ... staying your course to be well and calm is the only route you can take ... prayers for guidance strength and support for you both ..
    Congrats again on your award .. well done !!

    30 days ago
  • LUCYCAN7
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    31 days ago
  • NEW-CAZ
    emoticon emoticon Helene, I wish there were a simple solution for your daughter. emoticon
    31 days ago
  • GARDENCHRIS
    congrats on your reward, sorry about your daughter, i understand as my son is also dealing with some major depression. Hang in there and take care of you
    31 days ago
  • TSHAWGER
    Congrats on your award 👍
    31 days ago
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