Self-Sabotage, oh am I guilty of it!
Monday, August 26, 2019
Raise your hand if you are guilty of self-sabotage! Mine would be the first to shoot up, head of the class, first to take my dreams and aspirations and toss them to the curb. I am a coach and I talk with people all of the time about skills and tools to avoid these pitfalls, but do I listen to myself? Nope!
Since January I have lost roughly 30 pounds, and I am very proud of this. I have joined a gym and am attending classes and working out and enjoying feeling fitter and stronger. I have noticed that I have more energy and that I desire to move more throughout the day, unless it is my sabotage day.
There are days that I just want to eat burgers and french fries, lay in bed watching TV and drinking beer, because I'm an adult, why not!? I enjoy these things so much that a "cheat day" turns into a "cheat weekend" turns into a "cheat week" and then the next thing I know I'm paying for a gym I haven't seen and my veggies are spoiling in the fridge. Why? Why do I do this?
I have followed all of the suggestions: write my why statement, focus on the little things that demonstrate progress, move temptations out....I could go one. When it comes down to it, I struggle with self-control and coping skills. I'd rather have a glass of wine than sit with my feelings. I'd rather look to others for satisfaction and fulfillment than internally and feel that I am enough no matter what others say.
It is hard, and it is a long hard road ahead.
My goal for this week is simple: gym three days and push myself in my classes, food tracking, and no alcohol (not even if I have the calories for it). While some might say deprivation causes binges, I know my body does not lose weight with alcohol in my diet and I need to stop using it as a "wind down" at the end of the day.
Looking forward to seeing how great I will feel at the end of the week!