Day ??? - 140 lbs down, learning to love the body I have
Wednesday, September 04, 2019
Per several request I copied this straight from my CF post. I guess blogs show up differently, I don’t know, but here you go!
Good Morning Spark Family!!!
Today’s post is a little different. Y’all know I’ve been fighting the same 10 pounds, going up and down, for the last 5 months or so. I’ve done challenges, I’ve added in more movement, I went back to WW, well finally I talked to Shelby last week, myBoxFit trainer,and this is what she said... the fitter you are the less calories you burn, so even though you may be bigger then some of the girls in here, you have more muscle and are in much better shape so your body just isn’t burning as many calories as their's is. Also, because you’ve already lost so much weight (140 lbs y’all 🎉) your body may just be stalled right here for a while, but at this point honestly it becomes all about your diet. If you want to lose more you are gonna have to strictly stick to healthy food, watch your macros, and then you will eventually start losing again.
So then I went to my BFF, who is absolutely the smartest person I know, and they kinda confirmed all this, but then asked something to the effect of can you be happy with where you are now, if you want to go smaller, is it worth it?
And honestly, I don’t know. I eat healthy the majority of the time but yes sometimes I give in to the carb cravings, or I enjoy some of the sweets my daughter makes, and sometimes a Texas girl just needs a Whataburger, or some bbq with all the fixings. So can I be happy with where I’m at?
Hmmm....have y’all ever seen the story where the man touches each part of his woman’s body (because she’s unhappy with it) and tells her how much he loves each part. I always thought that’s the kind of man I want!!! But then as I’ve been thinking on this for the last week, looking at my body to see if I can be happy with where I am now, I said screw that, I don’t need a man to tell me that stuff, I’ll do it myself!!!
So I did.... I looked at my batwings, which I hate, but I thought of all the times I held and rocked my babies in these arms. How my arms are their safe place, how even now they come for hugs and snuggles. I thought of all the babies I’ve rocked over the years in the nurseries at church, all the toddlers I’ve picked up, all the friends I’ve hugged, all the ones I’ve held and let cry on my shoulder. The batwings don’t seem near as bad now. I even wore a sleeveless shirt to town yesterday!
I took a good hard look at my stomach. All the loose skin, but I couldn’t even be upset about it. This belly has carried 4 babies, three to full term. It has grown three tiny, perfect little humans that are my life, how could I hate anything to do with that?
Then I looked at my thighs, ugh!!! But I thought of how many times my kids have curled up in my lap, how many kids over the years (church nursery and 2s & 3s y’all) have climbed up on my ample thighs and snuggled in for hugs and stories, to play patty cake, to read books, or just wanted to sit and let me rock them so they could feel safe until their mommy came back. These thighs aren’t so bad!
Is my body perfect? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! But it’s been abused, it’s been beaten, it’s been raped, it took years of abuse from me, sitting around and using food as my drug of choice to numb the pain. It grew me 3 amazing humans, and now it’s doing the best it can, it’s doing the burpees, and the inch worms, running the sprints, hitting the bags, and whatever other torture I can put it through.
So yeah, I think if I never lose another pound, I could be happy with this body. I feel comfortable in it finally, and I will never hate it again!!!
Sorry it was so long! (I even edited out some 😂) Have an amazing day my friends, and keep sparking!!!!!
((Couldn’t attach the pic from my phone, sorry, you can go to my page to check it out if you want to see! 😬😊))