Monday, February 10, 2020
Jack Benny and George Burns met as young performers on the vaudeville circuit
and remained friends for life.
One day at lunch, Benny wrestled with the problem of whether or not to butter his
"I like butter on my bread," he said. "But my diet strictly forbids butter. Maybe I
should call Mary and ask her what to do."
"Jack," Burns said, "don't be ridiculous. You're a grown man. You should be able
to decide, without your wife's help, whether or not to butter your own bread."
"You're right," Benny said. "I'll just have the butter, that's all."
When the waiter arrived with the check, Burns pointed to Benny and said, “He's
"What?" Benny said. "Why should I have to pay the whole bill?"
"Because if you don't," Burns said, "I'll tell Mary about the butter."
- From Daily Clean Jokes