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Day 20: no sugary snacks

Sunday, February 23, 2020

Twenty days! Only ten left. Although I am now thinking of extending this to another 30 days, with the allowance of a piece of dark chocolate in the evenings. I haven't quite decided, yet, though.

Why? Because I feel much better, now, emotionally. Just more balanced. And, I'm not jumping on the scale even morning to a weight that is jumping all over the place. And, perhaps the most rewarding for me, is my waist-line is reducing more and more each week. I think we all have those spots where our weight sits and mine is in my stomach. Perhaps, the general summary is that I feel more in control, and giving my mind a goal has helped me have a reason to say no to the cravings.

I am struggling to sleep at the moment - perhaps that should be my next focus - and I was looking through photographs of the last few years on Facebook and also going through my blog titles. And what hit me was how much has happened in the last five years. One blog entry referred to me being offered this current job, and I thought to myself, it seems such a simply title but there has been so much more underneath, from what it meant to get the job, to what is has taken to do the job, and, have I actually been able to stop and breathe and feel everything that has come with this opportunity? No, I've eaten chocolate. The quick fix.

I think what I saw as I was journeying down memory lane is that it makes sense that I ended up turning back to my old chocolatey friend, and I don't need to beat myself up about it. I can acknowledge that I have felt a certain level of trauma. It is something that happens with great change, possibly part of the changing process, and I have some time now to accept all the feelings and let them go.

I had time to relax on my 20th day. My in-laws took my son out for the day and my husband was in bed with a fever. I went for a lovely 10km jog and then got home, sat on the couch with a cup of coffee and watched a rented movie with our cat curled up on our lap. I cannot remember the last time I did that.
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