Saturday, March 28, 2020
Yes, I'm naturally a cheerful and optimistic person . . . annoyingly so, I've been told more than once!!
So, what about "staying positive" during COVID-19?
Truth is, I've decided to stop efforting and achieving and leash yanking about staying positive.
it's an attitude I've borrowed both from intuitive eating and from Three Principles.
In the food context: you know that resistance-to-temptation fatigue you experience when you're on a strict diet -- regardless of what that diet is? So at the end of a long day of calorie counting and tracking and saying no no no and you must you must you must: you just don't have any resistance left? Or maybe even if NOT calorie counting, after a period of "other stress" -- lots of other stress right now? -- you just don't have any resistance left to assign to the task of not eating hyperpalatable junk food?
What's worked for me with eating is intuitive eating: eating what I want when I want, knowing that what I really want to eat is the healthy stuff. And stopping eating when I'm almost full: no discipline required.
This morning I made myself a gorgeous egg white omelette with cherry tomatoes and goat cheese and mushrooms on a bed of mixed spring greens and baby spinach. I was full when I finished it.
And then DH started preparing HIS breakfast: eggs and bacon and toast. It smelled SOOOOOOO good. But no: although I didn't tell myself I couldn't have any: I really did not want any. I really was full. So: I didn't take the desire to eat more to heart. I left the room.
What about moods? We can absolutely expect to have periods of low mood in the present circumstances. Or really in any circumstances. But: I'm not taking low mood too much to heart. It's just "weather". Internal weather.
When it's grey and drizzly outside, I don't expect to control that. Really, how crazy would it be to think that I could control the weather? So I don't take it too much to heart. I wait until it's sunny again . . . and perhaps I can even appreciate the rain while it's happening, noticing that the robins are singing ecstatically.
And when it's "internal weather": I'm in a low mood? Nope, I don't have to control that either. It's OK not to be Miss Pollyanna all the time. It's OK to be rather quiet and subdued. It's OK to be a little anxious. A little fearful.
But when I'm in a low mood of anxiety or fearfulness, I can remind myself: what I'm worrying about is NOT happening right now. Actually it is not.
What is happening right now is that I have everything I need. Right here right now in the present moment.
We made a quick grocery run during "seniors' hour" shortly after 7 am: The store entrance was controlled, the carts were sanitized, there was a hand wash station, the shelves were reasonably well stocked, the other customers were self-spacing appropriately. The heroic staff, protected behind plexi shields newly installed, was incredibly kind: and we got outta there in short order.
Can you believe: I was even able to purchase a bouquet of fragrant white freesia which I have divided: some on the kitchen table, some in my second floor reading nook next to my comfortable rose rocker beside my Gothic window . . . and I have time to read!!
At the moment, my mood is up.
And when my mood is down? I'll notice how I'm feeling now. And now. And now.