Where did the motivation go?

For years and years I've been trying to figure out the answer to that question.

I have plenty of good reasons for losing weight and being more active - my health, my future career, just wanting to feel "capable" again, and of course, being able to shop for clothing without hating the entire endeavor.

I know from past experience that eating healthy and working out make me feel great, and that by continuing to do nothing about my current state will only keep feeling depressed and unmotivated.

I'm going to reread some of my really, really early blog entries, when I lost 100 pounds, and see if I can rekindle something that will get me off my butt and making more of an effort. I don't want to be this person I've become - depressed, lazy, out of breath, worried about my blood pressure. I want to be out there riding my bike again, kayaking, running, hiking, and STRONG. Most of all, I just want to be strong again - mentally, physically, and spiritually.