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-JAMES-'s Blogs

My wife ... the foreigner
Sunday, February 24, 2019      12 comments

Another installment of "My wife the foreigner" ... my wife is German, and I'm not. We don't live in Germany. So she is the foreigner. But she has a certain wit in English, something a native speaker just can't buy. Today we are watchin... Read more
Quote of the day
Thursday, December 13, 2018      4 comments

Every now and then when watching TV my wife and I hear something that is memorable, causes us both to laugh, and is worth repeating. So when I hear on of those, I'm going to repeat it. I sort of wish I had a time machine to go back and give... Read more
Freezing rain
Monday, December 10, 2018      9 comments

As I was leaving the house today there was a delivery truck at the end of my long driveway, sort of stuck on the icy road. Spinning its rear wheels. I have a 4 wheel drive and decide if he would just get out of the way I'd be off. I opened ... Read more
We have a verbal agreement on file
Saturday, November 24, 2018      7 comments

A number of years ago my wife started working for a small wine importing company. In her first week on the job she got a call from a company that was about to ship the scheduled printer ink, telling her that they had a verbal agreement on f... Read more
The old fashioned way
Wednesday, November 14, 2018      6 comments

I can't find my iPhone this morning. I go to the Apple website on my MacBook, log in with my apple-id, a little radar map appears, and a pop-up window with a 6 digit code I'm supposed to enter somewhere, but where, on my iPhone? I don't kno... Read more
World ends at midnight, 12:30 in Newfoundland
Tuesday, October 16, 2018      8 comments

Most provinces in Canada jump by hourly time zones. Newfoundland is on the east coast, and for some reason has a time zone that jumps by 30 minutes, not a full hour. Hence the old joke that the world ends at 12:30 in Newfoundland. Today mar... Read more
What are the odds that there are two bombs on your next flight?
Monday, October 15, 2018      7 comments

The odds of a bomb on a plane flight are extremely low. The odds of two bombs on a flight are much lower. Then a crazy idea occurred. If I packed my own bomb in my suitcase, the chances of having yet another one on the plane would be super ... Read more
Feel the burn
Friday, September 28, 2018      7 comments

The expression "feel the burn" usually applies to exercise and working your muscles to exhaustion. If you know me, you know I have a memory issues, and I also do home renovations. So at supper yesterday I happen to look down at my stom... Read more
With our technology we can only get to 80%
Saturday, August 04, 2018      6 comments

At the car repair shop, and I hear the mechanic on the phone talking with a customer and he says "With our technology we can only get to 80%, is that OK?", and apparently the customer said yes. So I asked him about that 80% thing, and he sa... Read more
Cutting and burning my shoelaces
Sunday, July 29, 2018      10 comments

If you've read my blogs before you know I'm a cheap guy, and I like to make blog titles that catch your attention ... what the? ... and then in makes more sense. So I've got some synthetic shoe laces where that little plastic ends have fall... Read more
Taking gas out of the tank
Thursday, July 19, 2018      9 comments

A few years ago when my friend Arnold was only 94, and still witty and sharp as a tack we were going for a drive (I was driving). My car says how much distance we have to go before I need to fill up. As we started going he noticed that the ... Read more
How to crack an egg
Monday, June 25, 2018      6 comments

I've struggled for a long time trying to figure out how to crack eggs without getting little bits of shell into them. If I use a butter knife I get little shards. If I use the rounded side of a spoon it works, but I have to get a spoon. ... Read more
A short joke.
Saturday, June 09, 2018      7 comments

Did you hear about the agnostic, dyslexic insomniac? He couldn't fall asleep at night, he kept wondering about the existence of Dog. ... Read more
Each and every ...
Wednesday, May 30, 2018      1 comments

I was putting about a quarter of a strawberry on "each and every" quarter of my waffles. Then I realized that this phrase is redundant. Not only that, you are saying the same thing twice.... Read more
Lord of the Flies
Monday, May 28, 2018      4 comments

You may know about the Nobel Prize winning book "Lord of the Flies" by William Golding. This blog is not about that. I live on an acreage, and was painting exterior doors yesterday. So a whole bunch of flies came in, not 10 or 20, but hundr... Read more

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