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I need to vent

Monday, March 31, 2008

Okay...not a great week-end my dd age 9 lost her mind and in my attempt to calm her she yelled at me and said well if you did the things you are suppose to do I won't have to be so angry. I'm only angry because of you. So I calmly reminded her that she is a little girl and I am an adult...she is not the mother of her brothers, I am and she is sister and her role is to be big sister and help her brothers. My job is to correct the behavior. She would not let it go, she was seeving. That was first thing on Sat. My old ways wants a drink. Dear God...just for today...help me to stay sober. My dh lost his job in Jan. My house is a mess, the kids need clean clothes, and my oldest has a baseball tornament dh is the coach. He puts a lot of time and effort into coaching (btw...he does not get paid but he works hard for the team) So...we head to the game in seperate cars bc I don't stay for all of the games. I show my support to my ds but the other kids can't take 3 and 4 games in one day. My marriage is on the brinks...I believe in commitment, unfortunately my husband can not keep a job (that was #6). I am an enabler so he feels there are no consequences for his job loss cycle. my old ways say go get a drink and forget this mess my new improved self says give it to God...he loves me and he'll will take care of me Ive gotten to a point where I am so happy to workout! I love the stress reliever. So in the meantime, I will eat right, exercise, love myself, pray, and realize all is well in my world (no matter what it looks like)
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    I will continue to keep you in my prayers. You can do this, you will do this. I am sorry that this is all happening at once, but you are a strong woman.
    4858 days ago
    {{{Joan}}} What a cauldron of stress you're experiencing right now! I really do admire your strength in not reaching for a drink. I love what Erin said about "doing the next right thing." I hope your husband's job situation will straighten out and that he will come to realize how important it is that he bring in some income. We're all behind you all the way, hoping for much better days ahead for you. And remember how good you'll feel when you wake up tomorrow, knowing that you managed to avoid drinking! Lots of hugs, Sara
    4865 days ago
    You have such a great attitude and you inspire me to be strong and keep doing the next right thing. I am so sorry to hear about your troubles, but I know you can and will pull through this "valley." Just keep on praying and reaching out for support when you need it!
    4866 days ago
    You can do it my sister!!! One day and one step at a time! I will also keep you in my prayers! The devil is a liar!! You have got the Victory, God is more than enough!!!

    Keep up the good work!
    4866 days ago
    I am so you are not turning to drinking to wase your pain. It is a great idea to turn to God or exersizes when you are feeling stressed. I will pray for you. Stay strong and fight hard!!
    4868 days ago
    Stay strong! You are doing a good job just knowing what is causing your urge to drink. You aren't giving in to it and that is REMARKABLE! Great job! I'll say a prayer for you, too!
    4868 days ago
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