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Day 80 - Still struggling

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

First, thanks to everyone for your comments. I appreciate it.

I'm still struggling right now. Falling off the wagon and saying "screw it" (as I did with the Enchiladas on Sunday night) is often the beginning of the end for me historically. I've mentioned before that cheating is the biggest problem I have with weight loss... once I do it, it's easy to let that become the new pattern. And that's the struggle I'm going through right now.

Yesterday all I had to do was stick to what I'd already logged for dinner and no more. But in addition to the salad and the fish, I also had a serving of dried cherries and (sigh) another slice of cake after dinner. There were more slices of cake left over than I had realized.

My final calorie count for the day was 1811. Considering I was supposed to stop at 1550, that's not good. But I suppose it could have been worse.

Part of my problem is that the overeating from this weekend got me used to eating more. So now I want to eat more out of habit. It's a struggle to keep my calories down without feeling like I'm depriving myself. But 5 days ago, I didn't feel that way. It's amazing how quickly that can come back.

So here I am on day 80, 10 days away from my highly anticipated day 90, going through some of the same processes I did on day 1. But this time I don't have the super-fueled frustration I had in the beginning. But hopefully what I do have is 75 days of good new habits, positive results to lean on, a stronger sense of faith in myself, and the basic belief I can get there - that I can get this thing done!

Last night I did my 60 mins on the treadmill followed by my ab workout. My abs were burning last night. I haven't been doing them often enough.

I also still need to print out the arm workouts on a chart and start doing them. I watched the DVD the other night and wrote down everything along with the # of reps. I think for the arm workout I'm going to use level 2 instead of level 1. I'm already doing a bunch of the stuff on workout 2, so I might as well just pick up with that one. That surprised me. So at least that's good news!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am SO with you about how easy it is to get back into the bad habits. I figure I'll just do the best I can for now, and you can too! Like you said, the positives will bring you back. And I'm impressed you're still dedicated to the exercise--I would have said 'screw it' to that too!
    4816 days ago
    OK- I get what you're saying- I get tired sometimes and just have this void I have to fill and I decide food will do it for me. I used to beat myself up for that- but then I realized I almost always give other people the benefit of the doubt when they mess up, why not myself? Just log your calories and keep working on the changes.

    The other piece of advice I got from a "sparky." If you're binging, it might be because you're not eating enough healthy fat. I added Peanut Butter 2 0r 3 x's a week & Olive Oil here and there...as well as a EFA supplement- and a lot of my binging has eased up. In fact, one thing I do when I feel that "itch" is have 1 tsp of Skippy Natural PB- on a cracker or a piece of apple- and usually it satisfies the beast! LOL

    Hang in there- I'm moving slower than I thought I would too- but it takes time to learn a new language and a lifetime to master it.
    4817 days ago
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