Frustration, failure, solutions?
Thursday, March 18, 2010
I've only been meaning to blog for like ever. I should be doing schoolwork since I am on my break from work but I was very productive this morning at work and am feeling a teeny bit fried so I am giving myself a short break to blog.
I'm a bit frustrated, I know I shouldn't be, but I am. I can't seem to lose weight. I did hours and hours and hours of exercise last week and yet I didn't even lose a fraction of a pound. I know there are lots of possible reasons for this but it is still frustrating and it only amplifies feelings I've been having recently. Namely of hopelessness. I feel like I just can't fit in enough exercise to be worthwhile etc. I am trying incredibly hard to eat right but I feel like it's not enough. I just feel like a failure. I feel completely overwhelmed by life actually. I want to do so many things but can't seem to do any of them because school and work own my life. And it also seems no matter how many hours I work I never have enough money to pay my bills and have anything left over. I feel like I need to sit down and prioritize my whole life but I don't even have the time to do that.
I need to find some form of reward for doing the things I should be doing but I don't know how to do that. I'm really bad at figuring out rewards. I don't want to reward myself with food etc because that is counter productive but can't think of much else. I sort of want to put a $ reward system in place but am unsure of how to go about doing it.
I seem to be able to break down work tasks into manageable portions and prioritize and take one step at a time but I can't seem to do that with anything else and it is frustrating. Anyone have any ideas? I know I should be able to find a way to do what I have to and want to and be healthy etc.
I know I know, I'm ranting, but I'm not sure what else to do at the moment. I feel like life has overwhelmed me and my life has lost direction. Sigh...