SP Premium



Sunday, April 25, 2010

Well, my husband's mom is back in the hospital. She is 80 years old and in extremely poor and failing health. We spoke with her this morning and then with the doctor this evening. My husband is the Power of Attorney as well as the Health Care Surrogate. She has already been deemed incompetent and he is and has been making all of her medical decisions.

This evening, after dealing with this for well over a year of the "heavy" stuff, hubby and doc decided to take her off of her meds, give her the "regular" food that she has been literally screaming for and let nature take its course. She is a brittle diabetic and they are even going to stop her insulin. She has only 1/4 of 1 lung functioning and that is with full oxygen.

So, now, we wait. ...... I sure hope when it is my time that God takes me quick and painlessly!
The "stress" around here is almost unbearable! Hubby is drowning himself into the T.V. This is the normal way he deals with stress. I, on the other hand, eat....not good!!! Friday and yesterday, were the worst. Friday, while I waited in line at the grocery store, 4 candy bars jumped into my buggy....well, we all know that I just had to eat alllll 4 of them to get them out of my sight!! Boy, do I feel guilty!!

Between the stress and candy bars (and let's throw in PMS), I have just munched myself into fat overload....It was soo bad Friday that my pedometer even jumped off of my waistband and committed suicide!!! It hasn't worked since!! GEEEEZZZZZ..... Maybe, tomorrow I will go and get another one....What I really need is a lock on the refrigerator....

I think that I will go to bed now....it's too dark and rainy/stormy to go for a walk so at least if I am asleep I won't be eating.... Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day....
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Oh, Theresa... I am sorry for this most difficult time you, your husband, and your mother-in-law are all going through right now. It is a highly stressful, heartbreaking time in life, isn't it? We all cope however we're able under such circumstances, and nobody could fault you or your husband for resorting to those "creature comforts" right now. I wish peace and comfort for all of you...my thoughts are with you.
    4069 days ago
    Oh dear :( This is such a difficult time of life -- my grandmother was in failing health for years so I can relate to a degree.

    Food happens. So do candy bars. I know this first-hand (Reese's peanut butter eggs, anyone?). Do the best you can to dust yourself off and just go from there.
    4070 days ago
    Oh, Theresa, I'm so sorry you are going through all this. Please just be kind to yourself. Do the best you can and hold on. Know we are here. -Marsha
    4070 days ago
    Oh I am sorry to hear about all the stress you have been under. I have found when I am stressed that if I just go on a walk it helps to calm down the nerves. I sure hope things start to look up for you. Hugs to you and your hubby dealing with his mom. I know how hard this is. emoticon emoticon
    4076 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3322537
    I know everyone tells you - more stress - do more exercise and yes it does work, but those 4 candy bars are what I would of reached for. At least you didn't go shopping with the credit card to make you feel better - so their are many ways to look at the candy bar problem. Don't beat yourself up.
    It is going to be rough times ahead. Hugs are coming your way.
    4077 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3802882
    I'm so sorry that you've been going through all of this. People deal with stress in different ways. If the weather gets clearer, maybe you can take a walk or just get on your elliptical machine and work out some stress there. I usually bundle stress up and give it to God to hold - especially when it's too much for me to handle. Of course I usually wait until the stress has me in a tizzy first. Hang in there and know that you are loved.
    emoticon emoticon
    4077 days ago
    You are not alone...


    I send prayers for you and yours...there is no easy way to go through this. Just hang in there.

    I've got a candle lit for you, lady...and I've got prayers going in your direction.
    4077 days ago
    I feel for you. My mother's 81 with diabetes & Alzheimer's, and is just beginning the spiral. Our family's prayers go out to your family.

    4077 days ago
  • MARY1313
    you know I agree with your MIL! She knows she is at the end and she just wants some comfort food too! I can certainly understand that. bless her heart. I am so sorry this has caused you to be so upset. I would be too. but really what you are feeding is guilt at letting nature take its course. that is hard for us that are left here, but your MIL's quality of life is 0 and she just wants a little bit of quality herself. please don't feel guilty. and let your husband read this too. It's hard letting go, especially of a Mother, but she has decided its time and its her right to do that. she knows how hard it is on ya'll to go through all this stuff with her day in and day out. what a gutsy Lady.

    hugs my friend!

    4077 days ago
    Sweetie...I want to reach through and give you a HUGE hug!!!! We're struggling with Lewie's dad right now. He had a debilitating stroke the day after I signed my lease to my apartment 30 minutes closer to him. It's been really tough because he's been in and out of the hospital ever since. The doctors have stopped physical therapy, and he has basically given up in life. It will only be time...but heartbreaking all the same. Lewie's mom died from brain cancer that had metastasized from breast and lung cancer. She died very quickly. But, that left him with only his dad...he's struggling with losing both of his parents within 2 years of one another.
    4077 days ago
    I don't know how it feels to have someone that close very ill. Tomorrow is another day pray tonite for your mother in law,husband, and the strentgh for yourself. Tomorrow try to get some extra workout for those 4 candy bars. emoticon
    4077 days ago
    My dear, my heart goes out to you.

    Food is always the first thing I reach for too. Not my family, not prayer, not even the cat.. It's FOOD. Instant gratification, instant endorphin, instant pleasant sensation. When you are that stressed, it's impossible to be "mindful" of anything but escaping the pain of the moment because you are tired and nothing else matters.

    Even your mother in law, in her final hours, wants "real food" because its a comfort.

    No easy answers. All we can do is live one minute at a time, one hour at a time, one day at a time, and be more mindful with each step.

    Tomorrow is another day. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on. :)

    You're not alone
    4077 days ago
  • MICHY1980
    You made me laugh with the pedometer committing suicide comment.

    Sorry you are going through so much stress. I cant imagine how that must feel. Its a tough thing to deal with.

    Hang in there.
    4077 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.