Why can’t I do this???!!!!
Wednesday, October 11, 2017
So my problem is is there’s no thinking before craving hits the only thought I have is gosh that sounds good then without thinking any further I act on it and then that’s when the bins comes in. Those are the random cravings. Those are the cravings that come whenever they feel like it nothing triggers it other than it comes and I’m like hey that does sound good but let’s have it.
Then there is the nighttime over eating. this always happens when I’m leaving work driving home and realizing I just don’t want to cook. It even happens if I have a healthy snack or protein before leaving. That’s when the frozen pizzas come in and I end up eating 3/4 of a frozen pizza. And the sad thing is that If I don’t have it at home I will go to the store and buy it. And then I’m spending $30 $40 at the store on one nights meal of junk when I could’ve had bought extra stuff like a bag of potatoes or bag of chicken breast to have for more than one meal. Yes I have tried meal planning and freezer meals and crockpot meals but then only deters it a little bit because then after those meals are done I end up binging.
I’m sure a lot of this is a lack of effort that I really put into it. Part of me thinks that I’d rather just eat the food I want to eat. But then the other part of me and it’s sad that It’s a larger part that wants to eat better so I can lose weight but I just don’t feel like putting in the effort because I am just too darn tired. I feel like I don’t know how to get in the mindset to lose weight. I feel like I don’t know how to ignore the wanting to sit on the couch and be lazy and tired and then just start working out instead.
I honestly I’m sick of being this way but I feel like I’m not strong enough to change or have the desire to keep the change going. OK I should say I have the desire but I don’t have the will because my head is always making me overthink things and feel different things instead of doing what I know I should. When it comes to over eating, cravings, junk food, laziness that part of my brain is stronger than the commonsense part feels like.