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How to Feel

Thursday, October 17, 2019

Not knowing how to feel is pretty scary. September 27th 2019, I ended up being admitted into the hospital. I was discharged October 1st. What was done Right left heart catheterization diagnostic. To step back a little, I had not been feeling right. I knew it was my heart. I have a defibrillator. 3 weeks prior, I had appointment to see heart failure clinic. I was scheduled 4 in echo September 27 since I was symptomatic. Night before I nearly blacked out as my niece was leaving. I decided to wait until Friday which was next day to do echo and see my doctor. I was hospitalized and my outlook was pretty loom and doom. I probably didn't have long to live, Needed a heart transplant. This is very invasive and would add 5 to 7 years to my life. I was told that I would most likely not be stinted and my Eco and stress test showed nothing new compared to 2.5 Years. I had a praise God moment on the table. My graph from open heart surgery Was re stented and another stent as the stent I did have was closing and had another complete blockage. I felt better now, but these last 1 month to 2.5 yrs. I made it 2.5 yrs this time as it was 1 yr before. First time I made it 2 yrs without being in hospital. Hopefully God has given me 3 or more added years this time. Yes, I am being very optimistic, but it is all I can do, having hope. I don't have many dreams anymore, but I still have a few. It is super hard for me right now, but I need 15 to 40 pounds to lose. Losing 15 keeps me in range for transplant, 40 gives me a better chance.
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