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Wednesday, April 14, 2021

Twenty years after marrying the most abusive man ever, and gaining 250 pounds during that horrible relationship- I find myself living my dream life.

I have four amazing kids, a husband I love and proud to say I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. We've been together for 13.5 years and got married last September. I'm so happy I can say that. I have a job that I'm good at and am so happy for. I work with one of my best friends and live with another.

Since I've been trying so hard for so long to lose the weight and I've been stuck where I'm at for over a decade; I'm now considering weight loss surgery. I know people think it's the easy way out, but it's a tool.

I'm so much healthier now and I have this desire to jog or bike for hours but carrying this excess weight makes everything I do so much harder than it should be. I workout, break a sweat, and eat well.

I've been going to a nutritionist for almost five years and I'm still not happy with where I'm at.

I'm not giving up, I'm just exploring other routes to my goal.

I still want to be a hot mama! I still want to go to a beach and feel pretty in a bathing suit. I want to look in the mirror or at pictures of myself and feel like I'm healthy.

It's been a long road, and I'm tired of the uphill battle.

It's been twenty years since I was forced into an abusive marriage and I've been out of it for almost 18. I cannot go into 40 carrying the weight of the past.

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